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Forming opinions/making judgements

Discussion in 'Personal' started by Vampyria, Mar 30, 2012.

  1. Vampyria

    Vampyria New commenter

    Interested to hear your responses here folks!
    When forming opinions of other people, do you take into account how they treat others as well or do you rely solely on how they are with you, to inform your thinking? I've found people operated in varying degrees here. Additionally of course, it all depends on the situation, as well.
    Me-I know I take both into account whereas a friend just relies on how she herself finds people to the point of excluding all other input! Hmmm....not sure I could do this at all. For example, someone I once worked with was OK with me but I actually disliked her tendency to make harsh, misinformed judgements about another colleague - however, I know I always take the side of the person who's wronged!
  2. Don't be phased (sic) by it.
  3. Doglover

    Doglover Occasional commenter

    I tend to form opinions quite quickly, which are usually right.
    I will be influenced by how they act with everyone around them, and in particular children, elderly people and animals.
  4. Vampyria

    Vampyria New commenter

    Completely agree, Doglover. Not much opportunity to see people interact with old people ( though I heartily agree ) but I certainly use animals as a barometer!
    I remember once being really put off one teacher ( who later turned out to be a terrible bully ) when I heard she'd taken their middle-aged family cat to the vets to be PTS because he'd started urinating in the house! Of course they refused, suspecting a UTI. She'd had him since he was a kitten and her teenage kids were very fond of him. On another occasion she left him in pain all weekend with a different ailment. I couldn't believe it when she asked me on the Tuesday what I thought was wrong with him! I hasten to add money wasn't a problem with two salaries coming in!
  5. Always think the worst of people when you meet them . If events prove you right, you feel vindicated. If you're wrong, it's a pleasant surprise.
  6. kibosh

    kibosh Star commenter

    Couldn't have put it better myself . . . .with a small caveat
    "Always think the worst of people when you meet them and secretly hope for the best . If events prove you right, you feel vindicated. If you're wrong, it's a pleasant surprise."

  7. kibosh

    kibosh Star commenter

    Absolutely, and I always make my own mind up about people and never follow hearsay or gossip. Everyone gets three chances with me, blow that, they blow it for life. Except for when they are family. I've had to make a few allowances there.
  8. kibosh

    kibosh Star commenter

    Oh, and before people start wagging fingers . . . . . . I can accept the same harsh judgements back, and have done many a time.
    I've blown it before and deserved to be bombed out. Live and learn.
  9. bombaysapphire

    bombaysapphire Star commenter

    Any judgement I make of someone will always include how they treat others. I couldn't stop it from influencing me. If I know about it then it will impact on my judgement.
  10. I judge on how they treat others too- it works both ways though! If I really dislike someone based on our interactions but see their positive relationships with others, I try to use that to restore relationships.

    I generally start off liking people- it takes a lot for me to dislike people, not a lot to worry that they dislike me and huge amounts to show any dislike. I've been told I'm too nice, too trusting and too forgiving- possibly accurate!
    But people who are cruel to animals or children instantly get my back up (one reason a long term relationship unravelled was because my partner was very disparaging towards my dog; I got with another partner partly because of the way we both adored our cats)

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