1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest, welcome to the TES Community!

    Connect with like-minded education professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.

    Don't forget to look at the how to guide.

    Dismiss Notice

feeling very low and lonely with no one to talk to

Discussion in 'Health and wellbeing' started by Anonymous, Oct 13, 2011.

  1. Anonymous

    Anonymous New commenter

    Look forward to getting a job! And make secret new plans for your birthday that can't be spoiled. Surely the 9 months haven't been for nothing because you have got your PGCE. Don't despair. There is usually light at the end of a tunnel.
  2. nutella, Thank you. Just knowing someone who doesn't know me or my partner but cares enough to reply to my post makes me feel like there is a glimmer of hope :eek:)
  3. It's not unheard of to not land a teaching job straightaway. Are you both tied to the area you live in now (I understand that your partner has just changed jobs but...)? Could you consider a non-teaching job - anything - just to make rent for a small place together?
    I understand it's frustrating but I agree that if you've managed to spend a year living at less than market cost at his mother's whilst gaining a PGCE and getting him to work closer to home, it hasn't been all for nothing.
  4. anon8315

    anon8315 Established commenter

    That does sound hard but try not to lose hope - I am sure you will find something for January. Are you doing supply teaching in the meantime?
    I opened your post as your title sums up how I am feeling as well though my circumstances are quite different - I have a job but no partner! I don't mean that to sound "be grateful for what you've got" just that we all experience self doubt and isolation sometimes. I can't shake the feeling I will die a spinster! x

  5. <font size="2">I'm doing very
    small amounts of supply at the moment, but nowhere near enough to set up even
    the smallest of homes. My partner is self-employed and his client base is very
    specific so were really are tied to the area.</font>

    <font size="2">I'm seriously considering getting any old job, but am worried that
    this will remove me entirely from ever being able to get a teaching job in the
    future, but am also concerned that other employers will look at my
    qualifications and not want to touch me as if I do land a teaching job, I would
    obviously want to take that over anything else. After all, it's what I've
    worked so hard to do.</font>

    <font size="2">I wish I could talk to my partner more about all this, but as it
    is his mother that is the problem much of the time, it's not fair on him and he
    ends up being stuck in the middle, especially when she complains that she can't
    communicate with my, but refuses to talk directly to me and talks through him
    all of the time. [​IMG]</font>

    On the bright side, I have just downloaded another application form this morning and shall be spending the day carefully filling it out as I have not had my phone call for supply this morning.
    Thank you so much everyone for showing so much thought. It's very much appreciated and makes me feel slightly less isolated in my situation. [​IMG]
  6. There are non-teaching temping jobs that you could take that give you the flexibility of a short notice period - try an office work agency? Or something like a maternity cover.

    Don't know whether supply agencies/schools will accept a qualified teacher as a teaching assistant, but that's how I occupied the time before my PGCE started. Might be worth asking as it would give you a selling point over other NQTs if you spent a while in a school environment.

    http://www.uktemps.co.uk looks like it might have some stuff (general jobs to earn money).

    How does your partner feel about his mother's behaviour? Has he expressed any opinions of his own?
    At any rate if she is refusing to communicate her wishes directly to you, she has herself to blame for not getting her way.

    Chin up, easy to say and hard to do but there are plenty of people reading and caring. x
  7. Thank you Curious_k for your kind comments.
    I'm on supply at the moment and have booked myself onto the TES led jobseeking seminar this saturday to give me a bit more focus. I've also got some promising applications in too which i'm eagerly awaiting responses to.
    My partener is equally as unhappy with the situation at home, but we have no choice but to stay here for the time being. This is the hardest part. Knowing that we're stuck in such a difficult situation with no way out til i can get a full time position.
    It's really starting to play havock with my health. I can't get rid of a chesty cough/cold which is aggrevating my asthma, so feeling rather desperate for that perfect post to come along so we can get out and be the couple we deserve.
  8. leadlearner

    leadlearner New commenter

    I hope that one day in the not too distant future you will look back on this and be in a happier place. Meanwhile much luck and have you thought about doing some tutoring and maybe getting involved in Brownies or Beavers by offering to help, it might strengthen your cv. Wishing you all best,[​IMG]
  9. Thank you Leadlearner, you words are very kind.
    I hadn't thought about the Brownies or Beaver route, but think it's a great idea and something I'm going to look into.
    I really do hope that this happy place is not too far in the future.
  10. Hi badger girl, I have read a few of your posts where you have expressed lonliness + doubt over ever meeting someone. It is a horrible, helpless + depressing feeling. I was 33 when I met my partner and we have been together 6 years now, expecting our 1st baby after miscarriage + infertility treatment. I had lived alone for 4 years before meeting him and I was starting to feel I would actually die alone! It was awful. I was on anti depressants for a time (not just due to that) and I was so jealous + envious of my friends who had stable partnerships + relationships. I had been in a previous relationship of nearly 10 years on + off prior to the 4 year wildeness so thought that that had been my chance and I'd blown it basically! I had always gone out + had a good time; been out with lot of different men for varying amounts of time - some months and some years; but that bleak spell of 4 years alone really got to me in the end. I was almost ready to give up (if u know what I mean) when I met my partner, very randomly + very unplanned!! It was truely love at 1st sight - yes , it can + does happen (I never believed that!) And we've been together ever since. He was 35 at the time. You can meet people later in life. You are not old. We now are about to become parents far later than ideal I suppose - I'll be a month off 40 and partner 42 but we found each other late in life after previous relationships. You will meet someone + possibly when you aren't really looking (cliche but I found it true - I was always looking - then 'gave up' then met partner!) One tip - you do have to go out though even when you really can't be bothered at all. I very nearly didn't go out night I met my chap + neither did he! We often say 'thank god we did' ! Hope you feel more hopeful - you are not alone x

Share This Page