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Feeling completely overwhelmed!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy' started by Marie2011, Apr 16, 2011.

  1. Hi everyone, I've been lurking around this site for over a year now but only signed up today because I need some advice/support!


    I'm 21 weeks pregnant with triplets and finding it so difficult. I was a size 8/10 before I got pregnant, but now I'm bigger than most women are at full-term! I'm having trouble walking, my back aches all the time and feel so 'meh.'


    My husband is being great about it, but I know it's not easy for him too. We already have a 5-year-old son and really wanted one more child to complete the family, so you can imagine our surprise when we found out that we're expecting 3! We'll be ok financially and we have the space but I don't know how we'll manage our time - it was hard enough with 1!


    Don't get me wrong, I'm really excited! I love children and feel blessed that I'm going to have such a big family. Our friends and family are being really supportive, but none of them have even had twins, let alone triplets, so it's hard for them to fully understand.


    School has been brilliant too. I mainly teach A-level maths, so the students are really understanding and they're always asking me how I'm feeling. The problem is, I feel so exhausted everyday and I don't think I'm being the best teacher that I can be. I don't want to let them down so I'm planning to start my maternity leave at 30 weeks, which means that they'll be on study leave/doing their exams at that point anyway.


    My midwife has said that they don't usually let triplet pregnancies go past 35 weeks, so at least I've only got another 14 weeks of feeling like ****! Apparently, at 35, I'm quite old to be having triplets so maybe that's got something to do with the way I feel. I probably sound so ungrateful and I'm sorry for that, but I just need to let it all out!


    Does anyone on here have triplets? Any advice?


    Thank for reading x
     
  2. sally_nic

    sally_nic New commenter

    18 weeks with my 2nd pregancy (1 baby). Can only send you some virtual hugs and wish you well x x x
     
  3. toeinwater

    toeinwater New commenter

    I'm from the ttc threads and haven't had any babies, so from that point of view can offer no help. I didn't want to read and run though.
    I'm slighly surprised they said 35 doesn't see many triplets, unless they're looking at 35 as being young for triplets? I'd read that as you get older your body tends sometimes to 'ripen' more than one egg each cycle, in the hope of having one fertilised (plants do a similar thing: often if they are ailing/dying they flower, thus producing seed) Either way, I wish you lots of luck and happiness! [​IMG]
     
  4. toeinwater

    toeinwater New commenter

    Sorry, just re-read and saw they'd said you were quite old for triplets.
     
  5. Sorry, I should have phrased that better - I meant that family and friends think I'm too old to be having another baby, let alone 3!


    You're correct, multiple births are more common in 'older' women :)


    I think the consultant referred to me as an 'older woman' about 20 times in half an hour! Thanks!
     
  6. toeinwater

    toeinwater New commenter

    Ah! I see!
    How to make a girl feel good eh?

     
  7. Well that's a surprise finding out you're having triplets! I don't know anyone who has had triplets but I know plenty of people who have had twins or are a twin. All of them have said nothing but positive things about having a twin or being a twin. It made me want to have twins too!! Sorry not much help here but didn't want to ignore.
    Be the best teacher if you wish, but it's more important to think of yourself and be the 'best' mummy and wife than be the best teacher. You have triple the worry/the weight etc than all of us so no wonder why you feel so overwhelmed. Take it easy xx
     
  8. Sorry no personal experience of triplets, im 28 weeks pregnant with just one but wanted to suggest your local NCT, maybe they can put you in touch with women or a support group that can help you and share their experiences of having triplets.
    Congratulations and the best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy, 14 weeks will whizz by. x
     
  9. gosh you poor thing! i'm not surprised you're feeling overwhelmed - my OH and i struggling to cope with one and we both had a dream the saame night that we had twins and that scared us both half to death!
    take it easy, be kind to yourself and maybe look for some support groups for multiples? i know baby centre forum has boards for parents of multiples so maybe get some advice and support from them?
    good luck x
     
  10. There was a thread on the baby and toddler forum a while ago - I'd try posting on there, sure soemone had triplets not that long ago and there are a few parents of twins.
     
  11. Thank you all for your replies!
     
  12. <font size="2">I had my twin boys 3 weeks ago and know how you feel. I found the first half of my pregnancy really tough going. I was physically and mentally exhausted, had really bad back pain not to mention the rib pain - I just didn't feel 'human'. The good news is that, for me, it got sooooo much better during the 2nd half - the pains went and I was blooming. The tiredness returned during the 3rd trimester but I ended up loving being pregnant and really miss my bump now it's gone. Are you taking extra folic acid and iron supplements? The iron tablets didn't agree with me but you may be fine - they are meant to greatly help with feeling tired and sluggish. Remember you have 3 on board so will have 3 x the pregnancy hormones a singleton pregnancy will normally have!!! </font><font size="2">My boys were born at 35 + 5 and weighed 4lbs 8 and 4lbs 14. They needed some time in the special care baby unit as their blood sugars were very low but after 3 days we were on our way home and doing really well. The boys are great and not as hard going as we thought although my husband hasn't returned to work yet! </font><font size="2">I would suggest TAMBA and the Multiple Birth Association (MBA) as a good place to look for support and advice. Also you might find a 'Twins/Multiple Births Club' in your local area who may be of some help.</font><font size="2">Anyway, I hope you feel more positive soon. We didn't know what to think about having twins at first (and for a time wished we only had one inside) but now they're here we love having 2 babies and wouldn't have it any other way. It's a very special thing to have a multiple pregnancy and is worth all the pain and discomfort. xxxx</font>
     
  13. OH bless you and huge congratulations! I met a woman at a tamba conference who was pregnant with triplets with a ten month old baby. She was sick of people feeling sorry for her! I gave birth to twins 3 months ago and had a difficult pregnancy in terms of comfort as I had chronic sickness and spd. I actually felt a lot better post c section than I did pre! Anyway, multiples are fab. It's hard but not as hard as everyone likes to tell me it must be. Like Funkydelly says, TAMBA is an excellent place to look for support as our twin (multiples) groups. Advice from other mothers of multiples will prove invaluable. Lots of luck to you!

    Funkydelly: How are you getting on?? x
     

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