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Feeling a bit fed up

Discussion in 'NQTs and new teachers' started by charlotteu, May 6, 2011.

  1. I love my school at the moment, and ahve some great classes and colleagues. but I moved to take the job and am living on my own, and starting to find it really hard.
    My colleagues are lovely but all quite a bit older than me, teenage kids etc while I'm single and, tbh, not living in the best area for going out etc - just outside leeds but trains back stop at 11.20, and I hate the idea of going on a night out on my own!!
    I've looked for some groups etc to join but find it so difficult to do, and finding it hard to find people around my age (28) rather than much older. Looking for someone to live with is a similar story - nobody wanting to start a houseshare nearby, preferring leeds (which'd be a 50 minute train journey) and though I've looked at a few houses there's very few nearby on sites like spareroom. It's gettingso I'm seriuosly thinking about leaving my great school to go somewhere I have friends who moved from uni .
    How has anyone else managed this year?
  2. Sillow

    Sillow Lead commenter

    There's a little group of us who are under 35 and we do try and hang out together, but we'd never not invite people just because they're older! We try and socialise together, regardless of age.
    I can sympathise, though. I moved away from where I grew up and now my best friends are scattered between Cambridge and Sheffield. I can socialise with people from work, but it's not regular enough for my liking! So I try to get out and explore my hobbies, to make friends that way. It's a slow process, just let it happen gradually.
    One day I might not spend Saturday evening in with a (good) book...!
  3. jubilee

    jubilee Star commenter

    You love your school so be very wary about moving for a challenging city school and ending up to stressed to enjoy the bright lights!
    Go to your local library and ask for their directory of local organisations. See if there are any that appeal that are likely to have a younger cohort (environmental societies etc).
    Check out evening classes. Which pubs have a youngish clientele? Do they have a quiz team or similar? Join a leisure/fitness centre and vary your session attendance until you hit on the times when your desired demographic attend.
    Don't regard socialising with older colleagues as pointless. You might end up at events with their younger relatives and friends.
    Consider living mid-way between Leeds and the town wher your school is (on a bus or train route if you don't have a car). That would make it easier to socialise in the city with a shorter taxi ride home if applicable.

  4. thequillguy

    thequillguy New commenter

    This is a very familiar story. The last train from anywhere to my town stops at 10:00pm. The buses aren't much better; they stop at 8:00pm!

    Most of my friends are at least fifteen to twenty years older than me. To be fair I don't notice the age difference, although the fact that most have grown kids makes a difference to their lifestyle. Especially I don't have any!

    While the internet is a boon to keep in touch with people, and I enjoy friends in the two nearby university towns, it's not easy to have to drive at least 2 hours for a coffee.

    One thing said is to attend classes that might have older people there, but who might have younger friends/family to whom they can introduce you. I literally (and I meant that in the correct term!) visited every advertised social club (and visited near-on every pub and club) before deciding that I am the only person between 15 and 50 in this town. However, in the past year I have met other people by being introduced by their older family.

    Finally, I do appreciate my rural school. Having worked inner-city, I don't fancy working day-in day-out with the kind of urban angst I saw. Even in the plethora of outstanding schools in the nearby city don't float my boat. I think the grass is greener, but I truly appreciate reading of others in the same boat.

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