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Feel like a let down.

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by alicewonders, Jul 10, 2019.

  1. alicewonders

    alicewonders New commenter

    Feel like a complete let down. Within the space of a year I’ve had time off (6 weeks) with WRS due to daily panic attacks and then had 20 weeks off due to pregnancy related spd , which has meant I haven’t been able to walk or sit for anything more than 10 minutes.
    With mat leave starting tomorrow I honestly feel like the biggest let down and can’t get school off my mind.

    Has anyone been in a similar situation ? How do you get yourself to stop feeling like it ?
     
  2. starlightexpress

    starlightexpress Occasional commenter

    Ok. Turn it around, you’ve had 11 weeks not affected by illness. That’s still a term.

    Remember, it’s illness and pregnancy related. You can’t control either. So please don’t feel bad.

    Try to now relax and rest ahead of your baby coming. Try your best to tune out school. Maybe when baby is here pop in and send them update pictures. There’s nothing like a new baby to make us all feel happy and positive.

    Take care now and please don’t feel bad. I’m sure your school team is wishing you well/ the best over and above anything.
     
  3. frustum

    frustum Star commenter

    Having a baby will probably do the trick. Until then, just be strict with yourself that you are totally entitled to time off when ill, whether stress, pregnancy-related or anything else. Do some things you enjoy that you might not have time to after the birth, and relax. Once that child arrives it will take over your life - just let that happen and you will forget work.
     
  4. Piscean1

    Piscean1 Senior commenter

    I would try to put it to one side. Sickness is a fact of life. When you go back, no one will remember your absences, especially if they've seen baby.

    Your maternity leave is planned absence and you need to see it that way in your head. Planned in that if they aren't organised for it, that's not on you.

    I start my maternity at the end of the week and I know I'm feeling a bit fragile. I'm wondering if you're having the same sorts of feelings?

    It seems ridiculous but I feel like I'm losing a bit of my identity and things like not being on the list of teachers for next year, not having a class, etc. have really affected me in a way I didn't expect! Part of me is so excited for maternity leave (work is a struggle this late on) and baby but part of me is really sad because I feel so out of the loop! I'm sure when our babies arrive our priorities will change a lot! Good luck!
     
  5. mothorchid

    mothorchid Star commenter

    As I understand it, pregnancy can affect emotions, no? So you perhaps feel more strongly than you otheerwise might.
    Now it's time to focus on your baby. In ten years, in ten weeks, even, that's what will matter. Enjoy the little things which are, after all, the most important ones.
    School coped and it will continue to cope.
     
    agathamorse likes this.
  6. phlogiston

    phlogiston Star commenter

    You've had several periods of illness outside your control. You didn't choose that.
    It's quite probable that the cause of the panic attacks is also
    The people who matter will be.

    (apart from the cover supervisor - and you don't need to worry too much about them).

    Schools can easily become self centred, all absorbing worlds of their own. Life is more than planning, delivering and assessing children's academic progress.
    We all need to remember this from time to time.
     
    agathamorse and mothorchid like this.
  7. caterpillartobutterfly

    caterpillartobutterfly Star commenter

    How on earth are you a let down?
    No way would I be able to teach while pregnant...I have enough trouble summoning up energy and so on anyway.
    Who have you let down? If you'd battled in each morning, only to go home at 10 o'clock then you'd have been a right pain and caused all kinds of expense and disruption. Being off for 20 weeks straight through isn't a problem, school are insured.
    Sod work, you can't change anything...relax and enjoy the baby.
     
  8. SEBREGIS

    SEBREGIS Lead commenter

    Totally agree. Don’t spoil an amazing experience by dwelling on negatives beyond your control. And when your baby is born, take it in to show everyone. I absolutely guarantee no one will say ‘that’s great, but you know, we’re still peeved that you didn’t mark enough books last year.’
     
  9. scienceteachasghost

    scienceteachasghost Lead commenter

    Sometimes a roulette wheel will give a run of reds. Or a run of blacks. Illness can be like that, don’t worry, it’s a bit of unlucky statistical noise. Another way of looking at it is a supply teacher can probably feed their family this year! You now have an officially sanctioned break, sod school and enjoy the new life you are bringing into the world.
     

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