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Feel guilty not paying

Discussion in 'Personal' started by kittylion, Jan 15, 2012.

  1. kittylion

    kittylion Established commenter

    A year ago someone came door to door offering to clean out gutters for £20. I agreed and they also did some roof repairs for me. They gave me a quote for replacing the roof too, but I couldn't afford it (although it seemed reasonable).

    Today (Sunday) he arrived at my front door saying that he had been cleaning out gutters again for people on my street and although I wasn't in, he had cleaned mine too - and did I want him to come back every year or every 2 years?

    I said no to the yearly/biennial (?) visit and as I was on the phone at the time asked him to leave me his number.

    I feel sorry for him as it must be a difficult job and difficult time of year (perhaps - I don't know really) but if I had wanted this job doing, I wouldn't have chosen to have it done in January with all the post-Christmas bills.

    However, if he has done this job, I feel bad not paying him - but there again, although I tend to believe him, I don't know for sure that he actually did it - and in any case I didn't ask him to.

    What a quandary! Any suggestions?
     
  2. kittylion

    kittylion Established commenter

    A year ago someone came door to door offering to clean out gutters for £20. I agreed and they also did some roof repairs for me. They gave me a quote for replacing the roof too, but I couldn't afford it (although it seemed reasonable).

    Today (Sunday) he arrived at my front door saying that he had been cleaning out gutters again for people on my street and although I wasn't in, he had cleaned mine too - and did I want him to come back every year or every 2 years?

    I said no to the yearly/biennial (?) visit and as I was on the phone at the time asked him to leave me his number.

    I feel sorry for him as it must be a difficult job and difficult time of year (perhaps - I don't know really) but if I had wanted this job doing, I wouldn't have chosen to have it done in January with all the post-Christmas bills.

    However, if he has done this job, I feel bad not paying him - but there again, although I tend to believe him, I don't know for sure that he actually did it - and in any case I didn't ask him to.

    What a quandary! Any suggestions?
     
  3. tartetatin

    tartetatin New commenter

    I'd be tempted to pay him just this once (or maybe meet him halfway?), but make it very clear that you don't want him undertaking work for you again unless by prior agreement.
    In my experience, good tradesmen (roofers and the like) are sufficiently in demand without the need for going door to door, so I'd be wary when it comes to bigger jobs.
     
  4. No, it's not a quandary, as I see it. You have his number - so pay him.
    Stop trying to weasel out of it by doubting whether he actually did the job.
     
  5. tartetatin

    tartetatin New commenter

    Hi f&f
    As I understand it, the OP did pay for the work originally undertaken and agreed upon. He recently came again off his own back to clear the gutters, without actually being asked.
    Have I got that right?
     
  6. bombaysapphire

    bombaysapphire Star commenter

    I would disagree with this. Whether or not he did the work, you did not ask him to. If you do decide to pay him then you need to make it clear that you will not pay again unless you have agreed to him doing the work.
     
  7. kittylion

    kittylion Established commenter

    I can only think that you must not have read my post properly.

    I paid for the work I asked him to do a year ago but have not contacted him since - I am not trying to weasel out of anything. I did not ask him to clean out gutters - he came onto my property whilst I was out and did them - I had no idea.

    Does this mean that any Tom, Dick or Harry can come into your garden and decide to do a job you haven't asked them to do and demand payment by right?
     
  8. It's hardly a mega job - actually, it's more of an odd-job.
    Ok - so somebody - whom she has already paid for work previously done - does her a favour by clearing out the gutters of leaves and debris, but because he hadn't actually been invited to do the work, he doesn't get any money...
    I think that's mean and mean-spirited of the OP.

     
  9. kittylion

    kittylion Established commenter

    Yes that's right Tartetatin - thanks- (no weaseling involved lol)
     
  10. kittylion

    kittylion Established commenter

    I probably will pay him Funnyandfree but it's annoying as I am very short of cash this month. Strictly speaking I think I am not obliged to pay, but as I said I probably will because I'm not mean-spirited. However I really don't want him to do it again and feel he shouldn't have presumed - and it's hardly doing a favour for someone if you want paying.

    Anyway thanks for your input.
     
  11. Spanakopita

    Spanakopita New commenter

    Don't be so ridiculous. Of course she shouldn't pay for work that she hasn't asked to be done. Nothing mean about it.
     
  12. It's *bat*.
     
  13. Spanakopita

    Spanakopita New commenter

    Why don't you go and take a running jump, Rose?
     
  14. mandala1

    mandala1 Occasional commenter

    He hasn't 'done her a favour'! You don't pay for favours. In principle, I wouldn't pay for work I hadn't commissioned or ordered. As a one off, I might this time, but mainly to get the person off my back. I would make it very clear I wasn't happy with this arrangement.
     
  15. tartetatin

    tartetatin New commenter

    In that case, I've been getting this expression wrong for years! [​IMG]
     
  16. What! so someone decides to come onto my property whilst I am out and cleans my windows, washes my driveway, prunes some bushes, clears a drain or polishes my door knocker and then asks me to pay them and I simply hand over the cash?
    How would you monitor the quality and reliability of these tradesmen? If I want someone to do a job on my property I ask around for recommendations and then phone that person up and arrange an appointment.If I see them doing the job properly then they are paid.
    Maybe I have lived in a big city for too long but I work really hard for my money and I may be stingy but I wouldn't pay anyone doing unsolicited work on my property.

     
  17. I would pay him but only because id be worried that if I didn't he'd throw a brick through my window etc! I wouldn't want to pay him, and don't think you should have to. You didn't ask for the work to be done and its daft of anyone to suggest you are being mean-spirited by not wanting to pay.
    Just because I once did an online shop, it doesn't give them the right to deliver food to me every week and demand payment!
     
  18. You said you felt guilty about it so there's no need to get upset when someone else agrees with that! It's twenty quid and you have clean gutters. I'd be begging him to come back every couple of years!
     
  19. mushroomz

    mushroomz New commenter

    Unbelievable!! This idiot (supposedly) trespassed on your property, which is a criminal offence, and you are feeling guilty about not paying him??!? You should call the police; he has either assaulted your property or has done nothing to it, but is lying in order to pressure you into paying him - also a criminal offence....

    Mean spirited doesn't come in to it. Don't let the crooks get away with it!!!!!!!!
     
  20. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    To be honest, this man sounds like a very useful sort of fella, able to do a tricky job that's not easy to do by yourself. I had a guy come round a few weeks ago offering to wash out wheelie bins after they'd been emptied for £3 per bin. I thought it was a good idea and at least it showed some initiative and entrepreneurial spirit rather than just sitting on his backside and doing nothing (I chosen not to ask questions about tax and so on lol).
    I might be naive to think this way, but maybe the man was just trying to do you a good turn in the hope of proving his credentials as a trustworthy, hard-working person and ensure repeat business. OK, it was taking it a bit too far to do your guttering again without asking. However, if his services are useful and you'd like him to clear the guttering regularly, then just pay up this time and ask him to check with you first next time before going ahead.
    Alternatively, if you didn't ask him and don't want his services again, what about offering him partial payment as a thank you but tell him you didn't want it doing and don't need him anymore.
    I do think there has been a slight over-reaction here, assuming all manner of underhand things about a man who just seems to be trying to make a few quid in a difficult economic situation. He's offering a service and getting paid for it. Lord Sugar would probably be impressed.
     

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