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Fed up, child always wetting pants

Discussion in 'Early Years' started by dylan11, Dec 8, 2015.

  1. dylan11

    dylan11 New commenter

    Hi everybody,
    I need some advice what you would do in my situation. I am teaching a mixed Rec/Y1 class in an international school and have no learning assistant. In my class there is a four year old girl that is not toilet trained at all. She wets her trousers every day, does not even ask for the toilet and has no accidents, she seems to enjoy the attention. That is going on since the beginning of the year and the parents are not co-operating, according to them that only happens in school(what I do not believe, we have the older sister in school and she said that happens at home all the time).
    I would like to know how an UK school solves that problem,because I hold the opinion that it is not the teacher's job to potty train a child, that is the minimum requirement if someone wants to attend school.Sorry for my rant, I am frustrated, because it is not easy to teach this class, out of 17 children there are 2 native speakers and the others are learning English since beginning of this school year.Parents think that my class is a baby sitting place and not a school.
    Any ideas greatly appreciated!
     
  2. phlogiston

    phlogiston Star commenter

    Tempting to suggest that the school buys a bumper pack of nappies, invoices parents and puts one on at the start of every day.
     
  3. dylan11

    dylan11 New commenter

    Have thought about that,too, but that would open a can of worms.Parents have offered to bring the child in pull ups,but that would not help the situation.I m desperate and really disgusted.Maybe I am ready for the holidays.
     
  4. shmazing_teacher

    shmazing_teacher Occasional commenter

    dylan11 likes this.
  5. Kartoshka

    Kartoshka Established commenter

    Obviously it won't potty train the child, but it will, surely, help out in the day to day routine of the classroom, because you won't have a puddle to clean up and a pair of wet trousers to deal with?
     
  6. Msz

    Msz Established commenter

    It won't solve the problem but might give you a breather.
    How supportive are your management team? Could you arrange a meeting with parents and SENCO to discuss how to support the child to continence?

    In UK schools it's becoming an increasing problem and children will normally have an intimate care plan in place. In a class if 30 even with a TA having a number of children who aren't toilet trained can be a nightmare.
     
  7. JosieWhitehead

    JosieWhitehead Star commenter

    It is difficult to give advice, but I certainly think that school is not the place to potty train children. Oh yes, I may be old-fashioned and probably did the wrong thing, but I potty trained my child when she was six months old. After breakfast I would sit her on her pot, with a box of toys by the side and it was the time when children usually go. It worked. You have to get them onto the potty before they can get up and walk away. Then it didn't take long for my little daughter to start asking for the toilet. But to leave it until they go to school is very unreasonable indeed and it should not be your job to do this job. What on earth is the matter with parents?
     
  8. Msz

    Msz Established commenter

  9. dylan11

    dylan11 New commenter

    Thanks very much for your compassion, especially the article from eric was great. Makes me feel that there are other people in the same position.For two days I have tried to set the alarm for every 20 minutes to send the child to the toilet. It seemed to help, but there was a learning effect , she went to the toilet, didn't do anything and came back. Wet knickers again.I am so desperate that I am considering pull ups now, but that will not make the problem disappear, because I will have to teach that child next year again.
    It is a phenomenon seen in all international schools, children are brought up by the maid,can hardly make themselves understood, are not toilet trained and the mum lives the life of Jumeirah Jane. I strongly believe, some people should not have children, they should get a goldfish you can leave even alone over the weekend.
     
    cinderella1 likes this.
  10. Msz

    Msz Established commenter

    As you can see from the article it isn't a problem confined to International schools.
    I've had children in Y2 who are not toilet trained (no medical condition) mum said she was taking knead from child.
     
  11. shmazing_teacher

    shmazing_teacher Occasional commenter

    One reason why I teach year five!
     
    dylan11 likes this.
  12. GLsghost

    GLsghost Star commenter

    I wonder whether it's always the fault of parents (I appreciate that it often is)?

    Until recently we had a similar problem with our little step-grandson, who is now seven. Invariably he would come home from school with wet trousers and still had accidents at home. His parents had taken him to see a urologist and he'd had lots of tests. The urologist said that it was perfectly normal for some children not to have a very strong warning urge and not to realise they needed to go, especially if they were very absorbed in what they were doing.

    At home regular reminders to go and rewards did the trick, but I don't think the teacher reminded him as frequently.
     
  13. InkyP

    InkyP Star commenter

    That's what I did (early 80s) and it worked very well but it was beginning to be frowned upon then and very much goes against what health Visitors are telling young parents now.
     
  14. cinderella1

    cinderella1 New commenter

    I'm sick to death of changing children, and toilet training children, because their parents are to lazy to do so. It has got progressively worse in the last 5 years, I rightly or wrongly consider this possibly has something to do with parents spending most of their time on social network sites. Speech and language is also neglected. Health visitors?? Do they even exist anymore..
     
  15. nmcsm1956

    nmcsm1956 New commenter

    Dear Colleague, I had a similar problem. My response was: as the child arrives the "parent" takes the child to the toilet on arrival. Then later in the morning, I sent the child again. All the children are asked/sent to the toilet during the flow of the day, but this particular child was sent at other times too, regular intervals. This cleared up the problem over a short period of time.
    Good luck.
     

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