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Edu-speak nonsense

Discussion in 'Personal' started by EmanuelShadrack, Jun 1, 2019.

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  1. EmanuelShadrack

    EmanuelShadrack Star commenter

    Readers of serious threads only are advised to look away now.

    Whilst doing a bit of tidying up of my computer files, I came across this delightful bit of edu-speak. I'd felt compelled to record it, on account of its utter inanity:

    "We are unapologetically ambitious for every child"

    The phrase crops up fairly often, as a quick search reveals. It's in documents from the DfE, Headteachers' statements, job adverts etc.

    When I first heard the term, I wondered what "apologetically ambitious" might be. "We have high ambitions for your son/daughter, and obviously we're terribly sorry about this unsatisfactory state of affairs. We're doing our best to reduce those ambitions".

    What's the worst (or is that best?) example of edu-speak you've come across?
     
  2. minnie me

    minnie me Star commenter

    Beyond outstanding
     
    bevdex, chelsea2, BetterNow and 13 others like this.
  3. nomad

    nomad Star commenter

    "We will unleash multidisciplinary convergence outside the box."
     
  4. gainly

    gainly Lead commenter

    "You can join us on our journey and help nearly 900 students achieve their full potential."
     
  5. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    I only have to hear the word "journey" in an educational context and I am immediately seized with the desire to kill.
     
  6. littlejackhorner

    littlejackhorner Occasional commenter

    Probably not just eduspeak but blue sky thinking and building capacity always wound me up at staff meetings.
     
  7. primarycat

    primarycat Star commenter

    Me too.
     
    Lara mfl 05 likes this.
  8. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    The other one I hate is "favourable outcomes"
     
  9. EmanuelShadrack

    EmanuelShadrack Star commenter

    Well that's a high-powered position. I'm not sure I'm of sufficiently high calibre to take on such a demanding role.

    Hang about, it's an ad for a teacher of year 7 and KS3 maths at an academy in Middlesborough...
     
    Lara mfl 05 likes this.
  10. primarycat

    primarycat Star commenter

    You just have to think creatively.

    Meaning the speaker has no idea about what the school should do, so others have to think of something, then it'll be their fault if it goes wrong.
     
  11. Ivartheboneless

    Ivartheboneless Star commenter

    The problem is that over-promoted managers often suffer from craniorectal embedment.
     
  12. EmanuelShadrack

    EmanuelShadrack Star commenter

    Did a quick search for "learning journey". Came across a website extolling the benefits of the "journey map":

    Benefits of having the map are that it:
    • guides you through the significant culture shift involved in establishing Learning Power
    • provides a framework to get you on the right track and keep you there
    • develops Learning Power systematically through the curriculum, making sure it doesn’t fizzle out
    • keeps learning under review, so that Learning Power is always fresh and robust
    • brings and keeps everyone on board
    • ensures that Learning Power is deeply embedded so that it lasts and makes a difference
    I can consider myself enlightened.
     
    Lara mfl 05 and Jamvic like this.
  13. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    All of this stuff is what my Dad used to refer to as "edubollox"
     
    bevdex, Moony, Lara mfl 05 and 11 others like this.
  14. PGCE_tutor

    PGCE_tutor New commenter

    I once read a job application from a "results-driven change agent".
     
  15. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    I got told off after a staff meeting once for inserting the word "journey" into every sentence I uttered during the meeting. A lot of the others cottoned on to what I was doing and I think I managed to do quite a good job of ruining that meeting.
     
  16. Mangleworzle

    Mangleworzle Star commenter

    It's a sort of phishing in reverse.

    Start a company offering training in or resources on edublox, put up a website with lots of key words and the gullible or unrealistically ambitious come to find you.

    "Ofsted said we have to do something - anything! it doesn't matter what, but it must have some magic keywords in it."
     
    Lara mfl 05, Jamvic and ajrowing like this.
  17. EmanuelShadrack

    EmanuelShadrack Star commenter

    Actually the same website has an article entitled:

    "Why is it difficult to infuse the development of learning dispositions in Secondary schools?"

    I'd have thought the answer was obvious. Just leave the development of learning dispositions teabag in the cup a bit longer.

    And take it out before you put the milk in.
     
  18. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    Flightpath - come across that one ?

    F***ing ridiculous concept.
     
    bevdex, Missbubbleblue, Moony and 6 others like this.
  19. EmanuelShadrack

    EmanuelShadrack Star commenter

    I was considering using that term in the title of the thread, but concluded it was somewhat imprudent to do so.
     
    peakster likes this.
  20. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    Excremental increase - I just made that one up - but it sounds good.
     

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