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Don't you just love these emails?

Discussion in 'Personal' started by BelleDuJour, Jan 11, 2019.

  1. BelleDuJour

    BelleDuJour Star commenter

    The latest in a selection of hilarious emails sent to tickle my funny bone!

    'Hi, stranger!

    I hacked your device, because I sent you this message from your account.
    If you have already changed your password, my malware will be intercepts it every time.

    You may not know me, and you are most likely wondering why you are receiving this email, right?
    In fact, I posted a malicious program on adults (pornography) of some websites, and you know that you visited these websites to enjoy
    (you know what I mean).

    While you were watching video clips,
    my trojan started working as a RDP (remote desktop) with a keylogger that gave me access to your screen as well as a webcam.

    Immediately after this, my program gathered all your contacts from messenger, social networks, and also by e-mail.

    What I've done?
    I made a double screen video.
    The first part shows the video you watched (you have good taste, yes ... but strange for me and other normal people),
    and the second part shows the recording of your webcam.

    What should you do?

    Well, I think $615 (USD dollars) is a fair price for our little secret.
    You will make a bitcoin payment (if you don't know, look for "how to buy bitcoins" on Google).

    BTC Address: 1PH5CYMeD4ZLTZ2ZYnGLFmQRjnptyLNqcf
    (This is CASE sensitive, please copy and paste it)

    Remarks:
    You have 2 days (48 hours) to pay. (I have a special code, and at the moment I know that you have read this email).

    If I don't get bitcoins, I will send your video to all your contacts, including family members, colleagues, etc.
    However, if I am paid, I will immediately destroy the video, and my trojan will be destruct someself.

    If you want to get proof, answer "Yes!" and resend this letter to youself.
    And I will definitely send your video to your any 10 contacts.

    This is a non-negotiable offer, so please do not waste my personal and other people's time by replying to this email.

    Bye!'

    How very jolly.......................especially the bit that tells me I have visited some slightly dodgy sites lol!
     
    Jamvic and Lara mfl 05 like this.
  2. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    I thought you were being praised for the high quality of the pornography that you consume.
     
  3. sbkrobson

    sbkrobson Star commenter

    "You have 2 days (48 hours) to pay. (I have a special code, and at the moment I know that you have read this email)"

    Hang on-I think i work with this chap!
    I totally recognise the language; he's the one who provides staff with the data entry deadlines.
     
  4. nomad

    nomad Star commenter

    :D
     
    Jamvic likes this.
  5. Rott Weiler

    Rott Weiler Star commenter Forum guide

    A rather less amusing scam is this one. The sender has a contract to kill you (he claims) and if you don't pay him 4,000 bitcoin he will send a hitman to kill you. Still, look on the bright side, at least your elimination will be instant and pain-free :)

    [​IMG]
     
    sabrinakat likes this.
  6. sbkrobson

    sbkrobson Star commenter

    And yet "Totally eliminating peoples small business" might actually be useful in January, you know, just when you want to shed a few pounds...
     
    BelleDuJour likes this.
  7. blazer

    blazer Star commenter

    I've had a couple of those. I tried to report them to Virgin but there isn't a mechanism to do it.
     
  8. dunnocks

    dunnocks Star commenter

    Ive had loads of these, and the current TV liscence scam ones.

    ignore totally any email claiming you need to renew your tv liscence online. Therre have been reports in the BBC of people losing thousands with that scam, and they cn't get it back, either.
     
  9. Ivartheboneless

    Ivartheboneless Star commenter

    You had me worried so I checked all my email accounts and I haven't had any of them.
     
  10. BelleDuJour

    BelleDuJour Star commenter

    I'vehad the TV licence ones too but as I don't have a TV licence (Mr Belle does!) I find it most amusing!
     
  11. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

    Also... entrepreneurial small business... it's tough right now with Brexit uncertainty hitting the overseas market... we should be supporting these dynamic go-getters...
     
  12. magic surf bus

    magic surf bus Star commenter

    My computer doesn't have a webcam so I'm not sure where all the incriminating video will have come from. Nor am I active on social media, so do your worst matey.

    Another version mentions playing the 'videotape' to friends and associates - talk about retro technology. Does that scream "North Korea" to anybody apart from me?
     
  13. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

    So I shouldn't take the threat I received today too seriously? To release the ''grammophone'' to the local ''newspaper''.
     
  14. Spiritwalkerness

    Spiritwalkerness Star commenter

    I've had several of those. Can't wait for them to be posted. I have the cases ready
    [​IMG]
     
    lanokia likes this.
  15. Mangleworzle

    Mangleworzle Star commenter

    Your likeness and comments have been recorded by a fast sketch artist and short-hand expert, once the pony carrying the letter arrives, you're in big trouble matey. Please send 100 sovereigns to the following address...
     
    Jamvic likes this.
  16. sbkrobson

    sbkrobson Star commenter

    Not necessarily.
    My take on it was that the originator is somebody who learnt their English solely by watching the film "Thelma and Louise" ninety seven times.
     
  17. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

    600 monks have individually scribed your likeness onto parchment and shall be sending it by coastal ship, forgiving dastardly French pilots, at the soonest convenience. May the Lord have mercy on your soul.
     
    Jamvic and Mangleworzle like this.
  18. Ivartheboneless

    Ivartheboneless Star commenter

    Hold on there, 100 sovereigns is a lot of dosh!
     
  19. Mangleworzle

    Mangleworzle Star commenter

    Well you shouldn't have been so naughty.
     
  20. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

    These papyrus reeds are getting a bit flimsy... time to move forward in the technology.
     

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