1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest, welcome to the TES Community!

    Connect with like-minded education professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.

    Don't forget to look at the how to guide.

    Dismiss Notice

Do you get on with your in-laws?

Discussion in 'Personal' started by bizent, Dec 7, 2011.

  1. magic surf bus

    magic surf bus Star commenter

    I got on fine with my in-laws, both sadly no longer with us. My FiL was a lovely chap, who put up with both diabetes and heart trouble in a jovial and positive manner before succumbing to a combination of both plus other complications way too early. My MiL was a bit eccentric but never bothersome. She obviously learned to drive on a Scalextric set - she clearly thought the white line was where the car drew its power from and did her best to drive astride it at all times. She grew up in genuine poverty and was condemned at her junior school as educationally beyond hope simply because her eyesight was poor. She was actually a very astute woman. I still miss them both.

    Mrs MSB always got on with my Dad, as did I, but my Mum used to drive her (and me) scatty at times, it has to be said. She could be extremely judgemental, which tended to ruffle feathers. Being the ones who lived some distance from the ancestral home always meant the relationship was going to be different, as she saw less of our lives and her grandchildren than maybe she'd have liked to. So it goes.
  2. lurk_much

    lurk_much Occasional commenter

    I noted 10 or more years ago that I was actually older than the in-laws were when I first met them. It caused me to reconsider my impressions of them, it made them almost human. I am very fond of them now, I often give them little presents, a rubber rat or a squeaky toy is always appreciated.
  3. Dragonlady30

    Dragonlady30 Star commenter

    I never met my inlaws as, being an 'older' bride, they had died before I met my husband. Hubby was the same as my parents were dead when we met.
    From what I have heard about my FIL, I think we would have got on like a house on fire. MIL was a fiesty lady, just like me so I believe I would have had to be a tad careful.
    Hubby and my dad had love of cars in common. Not sure how mum and hubby would have got on but I think he would have charmed her, just as he charmed me.
  4. Thank you, Bauble and Dunteachin, for your kind appreciations of my 'jottings'. Since, at the moment, due to the left, lower quarter of me being encased in plaster, I cannot get about much, I while away the time reminiscing. Actually, my situation, although physically restricting, is quite liberating, in a wider sense. As I cannot 'do' very much about anything, I have stopped worrying about it.
    I was much amused by the OP's description of her mother-in-law as having learned to drive on a Scalectrix track, due to her habit of straddling the white line in the middle of the road. This lady reminds me somewhat of my late father, who could, when the mood tokk him, be an 'obstructional' driver. When I was a small boy, I liked to ride in the sidecar of his M20 combination. Having a single cylinder side-valve engine, the BSA M20 was a slow, plodding machine. If a car came up behind us and, even worse, had the temerity to sound his horn at us,my father would deliberatly ride nearer the white lines, to frustrate the would-be overtaker.
  5. Not really- FIL is great but MIL is hard work- we have very little in common and I find her rude, interfering and offensive. She tried to book my one year old French lessons without even asking - my daughter didn't even speak a word of English at the time... She is unrealistic about how amazingly intelligent my (boringly normal) daughter is and wants her to do as much extra classes as possible when she finally goes to school. Agh!

    She also does all of the washing for her 35 year old son- and even hoovers his house- she can't let her boys go so it is hard work...The guilt trips she gives us are shocking. She thinks a womans place is in the home and men should not have to chase nappies/cook/clean etc....
    She means well- though her recent rant about 'selfish teachers' who should accept the cuts in pensions as we all have to make cuts really ****** me off.... Especially as she certainly has not had to tighten her belt!

    I could rant for a while.... She could be worse though... She could be worse. She could be worse....She could be....
  6. My in-laws are fantastic and we get on incredibly well. My mother-in-law loves treating everyone. Not grand gestures just little things. She is brilliant at gathering together things you will need and presenting them to you just at the right time. For example, just before our wedding day she surprised us with her 'bottom drawer' which was full to bursting with all sorts of useful household items. Just before our first baby was born out came a box filled with all sorts of baby paraphernalia. She has now moved on to doing the same for the grandchildren now that they are grown up. She loves it.

    When we went through a financially difficult time she would come out into the kitchen to 'give me a hand.' She would then empty out the contents of her shopping bag with things that she had smuggled out of her freezer and cupboards. 'Don't let on to father,' she would say but I'm convinced that he knew anyway.

    My father-in-law was just as generous giving little cash gifts here and there but more importantly he gave so much of his time to the children. As babies he wouldn't put them down, absolutely doted on them. They have lots of lovely memories of the time he spent with them. I remember him building them a go-cart, which they thought was great. He really enjoyed doing the things with them that he missed out on doing with his sons due to work commitments. He died 18 months ago and we all miss him so much.
  7. Dragonlady30

    Dragonlady30 Star commenter

    What a wonderful post.
    There's no need to say how lucky you are-you know it and it's there in every line.
  8. My father-in-law was an exceptional man, in that he understood the functional vagaries of the Velocette clutch; a strange mechanism that could slip and drag simultaneously. Indeed, it was he who influenced me to buy an aging Venom model, which he was able to, more or less, keep on the road, during my time as a penurious post-graduate student. Many times did he struggle with my machine’s recurring problems of over-heating, oil tightness, as well as the aforementioned idiosyncratic clutch. I remember him converting the machine’s electrical system from six to twelve volts, skilfully using metal snips to cut out a heat sink for the Zenner diode from sheet aluminium.
    There were limits, though, to his sentimentality towards my Venom, as I found out one Monday morning when, as I was riding along, hot oil started issuing from what seemed like every joint face and tube. This oleaginous cascade rapidly escalated into an eruption as the cap burst off the oil tank. When he saw the state of it, he looked at the bike, and then to me, and said, “It’s b*ggered for good, this time.”
    <font face="Times New Roman" size="3"> </font> I found it little consolation that I was not the only person to be afflicted by exploding tanks, that Monday morning. It was April 13th 1970.

  9. lurk_much

    lurk_much Occasional commenter

    I had an LE Velo Club Badge. The LE Velo was less useful.

  10. I'm sure my F-i-law would be helping you with your bike now. He has a shed of bits that will come in useful.( know where OH gets it from). The only person who can go back every decade in a one conversation. Used to drive my S in L up the wall with his reminisces of the bike tour around south west in 1950s for example.
    Mother in law is lovely and we can chat for hours. My kids love her, more so than my Mum who was always so strict (well meaning though)
  11. lindenlea

    lindenlea Star commenter

    My d-i-l has just cut the gordian knot that is this weekends arrangements with one thoughtful suggestion - bless her.
  12. My inlaws are fantastic. I met my partner while we were both o/s and one thing lead to another and we decided to move in together in the Netherlands (which is where he is from)
    I met them less than 12 hours after I had landed jet lagged to hell, completly and utterly confused, and wondering what the hell I had gotten myself into!!!
    But all is good, they have been some of the most wonderful and supportive people I know, they switch to English when I am around (My Dutch is still not that good) they help us out if needed andare always trying to help us.
    My partner has met my parents and he also thinks they are fantastic and he agrees with me when I say that they are all very similar to each other, which to me is amazing considering they live on the other side of the world to each other!
  13. My partner unfortunately was orphaned at the age of 18 months (his mum died in childbirth (this was in Uganda) and his father was killed serving in the Army) so he was brought up by his aunt who never married and never had children of her own. I have not met her yet as she lives back in Uganda but she is hoping to come to the UK in the New Year for his graduation from university so I will get to meet her then.
  14. impis

    impis New commenter

    My MIL was a lovely lady who always took my 'side'. She used to come on holidays with us, after my FIL died [she wouldn't have had holidays, otherwise] and she and I used to gang up on poor Mr Impis who didn't get much of a say over what we did, or where we went. She knew all the celebrity gossip, and I miss her.
    My DIL is also delightful. Strangely, I can see much of me in her. She's physically similar [to how I was at that age] and has the same ethos and life's ambitions. My son is very lucky to have found her.

Share This Page