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Do you argue with your OH about sex?

Discussion in 'Personal' started by BelleDuJour, Mar 16, 2012.

  1. BelleDuJour

    BelleDuJour Star commenter

    Annie.....the golden rule is if the man is tired it's ok, if the woman is tired she's frigid [​IMG]
  2. Seadream

    Seadream New commenter

    If I tell Mr S I'm too tired, then it means, that I don't care, never make any effort, no longer fancy him etc etc... as opposed to I just want to go to sleep please.
  3. It just seems, that if I'm tired, that there is all hell to pay (including him going off to bed in the spare room), but on the nights that I'm "interested" and he's too tired...then I lovingly accept that he's too tired.

    I tried to discuss this with him tonight, but it has not ended well.....
  4. Nah, we never argue about it any more. Sex on his birthday, none on mine.[​IMG]
  5. BelleDuJour

    BelleDuJour Star commenter

    Leave your computer on with this thread open!
    Mr Belle is a househusband. He hasn't worked for donkey's years (hasn't had to. His choice not forced upon him). He's not exactly stressed. Most of the time there's just the two of us, we're pretty tidy and we have a cleaner (I know!). He's not exactly run off his feet by any stretch of the imagination.
    I work. I work bloody hard and am often mentally and physically exhausted at the end of a working day. He interprets this as rejection. I know it's just sheer exhaustion and needing to sleep. I'm a bad sleeper so when I am so tired I could crash on a washing line then all I want is sleep.
    Why don't men understand?

  6. BelleDuJour

    BelleDuJour Star commenter

  7. Thanks.... he's gone off back to bed in fhe huff, when, I just tired to nicely point out the difference.....x
  8. Seriously though..... it seems like me being too tired, is just NOT an option.... an if he seems physically not interested, then itt''s up to me to 'revive' him.... (sorry... you know what I mean!) Just seems a bit unfair somehow...
  9. BelleDuJour

    BelleDuJour Star commenter

    When a man threatens to sleep in the spare room (or indeed does flounce off into said spare room) he does so because he thinks he is punishing the woman. He then expects cries of 'please don't go' from his partner.
    In reality he is not punishing her at all.
    It is he whogets a rotten night's sleep because:
    a) if due to lack of sex he will think his balls will burst and so lie awake to make sure they don't
    b) it is not his usual bed so he won't sleep as well
    c) he'll be thinking of you all tucked up and cosy in the marital bed but
    d) he's usually to proud to admit defeat and go back to join you
    As for the woman. She gets the whole bed to herself and a night of peace and quiet with no snoring and no pestering for sex!
    When Mr Belle throws his toys out of the pram and threatens to sleep elsewhere I just tell him to get on with it.
  10. harsh-but-fair

    harsh-but-fair Star commenter

    Unlees your birthday falls on a Saturday, presumably?
  11. sparklyeyes

    sparklyeyes New commenter

    A question Belle, and I don't want to come acorss as rude or stroppy but from what I've seen of your posts previously, you have married a rich man who worships you. Why do you work so "bloody hard" so that you are left "mentally and physically exhausted"? You haven't been married long have you? Stop working so hard. Spend more time with your man. [​IMG]
  12. What's "sex"?
  13. Unlees your birthday falls on a Saturday, presumably?
    Good God no. It's the rule ......no sex on my birthday, it's part of my birthday treat.
  14. Brilliant!!!! [​IMG]
  15. Am I right in thinking Mr Boxed in doesn't work either ( like Mr Belle)?
    I'd tell them both to get full time jobs and then see how much energy they have......
  16. Thanks for replies... I'm off to bed now... I'm assuming (given that its' 3 am Oz time,) that he'll be fast asleep..... but think we might have to have a wee chat about this recurring trend in the morning........... Because I'm now getting annoyed that i'ts ok for him to be too tired (and I just cuddle him when he is) and him just cuddling me when I'm tired is just NOT an option for him!!!
  17. OMG!! I thought it was just my hubby who did this. Glad to know I'm not alone.
  18. bombaysapphire

    bombaysapphire Star commenter

    You need to find a time for sex when you are less likely too be tired (either or both of you). Sunday afternoons?
    There is no law that says sex has to be after bed time.
  19. giraffe

    giraffe New commenter

    Actually, we argue about just about everything else, but not that, strangely enough.

    With reference to men who react like OP, I reckon it's old thinking about which gender is passive and which is active in sex - they reason that even if a woman doesn't feel like it, she can just lie there and put up with it, whereas a bloke needs to be in the right frame of mind to be, erm, 'equipped for action'.
  20. Do you argue with your OH about sex? Only when I get caught. :¬((

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