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Difficult child in my son's Year 1 class

Discussion in 'Personal' started by Seadream, Nov 7, 2011.

  1. Seadream

    Seadream New commenter

    I'd be grateful on any advice regarding what to do with the following situation: There is a lad in my son's class who constantly disrupts the class with shouting out and bad behaviour. He has physically hurt several children and my son says that he always sticks his leg out so that he trips over, pokes and kicks him if he's nearby and at lunch times 'fights' him if he won't join in playing and also teaches him a wide selection of swear words and gestures. My son is not being singled out by this lad. I've spoken to five other parents whose sons are being affected by this boy's behaviour. I know that the lad does not have anyone in class 'supporting' his behaviour. Parents complained throughout Reception Year and I wrote to the teacher and asked for my son's carpet spot to be moved away from him (which she obliged). However, this boy is making several children's school lives a misery and parents of many children in the class say that their children can't hear a thing at carpet time as he is so disruptive. My son is an August birthday and struggling. I don't want anything else holding him back and this lad is a huge negative influence on him. Any ideas as to what the school should be doing and what I/we as parents can do?
     
  2. Torey

    Torey Occasional commenter

    Go and speak to the head teacher and ask them what they are doing about the situation. If you are sure this is all happening and talking to the head doesn't work, then ask for the complaints procedure. Make sure other concerned parents get a copy as well. If the child has significant difficulties with his behaviour they should be seeking advice from outside agencies-although they shouldn't discuss details with you.
     
  3. Go and speak to the class teacher and voice your concerns. Then maybe speak to the head. In my experience teachers are often left struggling with no support with a difficult child and it's only when parents raise their concerns to the head that support gets put in place. Just my opinion- others may well offer other advice.
     
  4. Seadream

    Seadream New commenter

    Thanks Torey. I know all about the confidentiality side obviously and I only know other parents had problems with him as I overheard. I was being so careful not to mention the lads name (to other parents) when I said that my son was having problems then realised I had my teacher hat on and that as a parent I can. I don't expect details from the school but I'm seriously considering removing my son from the school and I've heard other parents say similar. I've absolutely no doubts whatsoever as regards to what this lad is doing. The parents are coming to me for advice as they know I'm a primary (part-time) teacher too but I'm in a mess over how to react as a parent and how to react as a teacher. I shall speak to the headteacher.....
     
  5. Seadream

    Seadream New commenter

    Several parents have spoken to the teacher and nothing has changed which is why I decided to write down my concerns to her. She's taken note and moved my son but I will go to the head for both our sakes.
     
  6. When my son had just started Year 7 I noticed that his books sometimes had the title and date, a sentence and a ruling off. I thought for a while that it might be that they'd had a speaker or a video, for example. But when I asked him, it turned out that quite a few lessons a week were completely written off by two, and one especially, boys in the classes that were not set. The playground network had obviously disappeared but when I rang other parents I'd known from primary, they'd had the same concerns and two had already complained.
    Nothing was done of course until a group of us got together and wrote a letter to the SENCo and the HT, and that having been ineffective, a letter to the BoG, warning them that the LA would be the next stop. Both boys were placed elsewhere.
    We allowed the Playground Fascist comments and the accusations that we had ruined the boys' lives to float over our heads.
     
  7. breadmaker

    breadmaker New commenter

    Just to echo advice already given. You must ask to see the HT. I totally agree that the class teacher may be left to deal with this alone and the HT really has no idea of how disruptive this child is all day everyday on the whole class, so somebody needs to tell him/her!
    Make sure you stick to your own complaints and not heresay from other parents and you may well find that the class teacher welcomes your intervention as a means to getting something done for everyone's sake.
     
  8. Torey

    Torey Occasional commenter

    As a parent you put your own child first and do what is best for him. As a teacher you would consider the other child's needs as well.
    Are any of the other schools worth considering? Be aware that I have seen children move schools due to another child only for that child to turn up as well. It is worth seeing if you can 'motivate' school to be more proactive as a first step.
    Sorry I didn't know you were a teacher-lots of parents post.
     
  9. Seadream

    Seadream New commenter

    Thanks again for more advice. It's obvious that I should speak to the head I haven't really considered that the teacher may be struggling for support - I've just thought about what I'd do if he was in my class. I hope that she has been able to show the headteacher the letter I wrote. Do you think that I should approach the heateacher on my own or with one of the other parents to substantiate that the lad is disrupting more than one child?
     
  10. Torey

    Torey Occasional commenter

    Go on your own and just talk about your own child.
     

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