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Death of Parent during School Holidays

Discussion in 'Personal' started by nad21, Jul 11, 2019.

  1. nad21

    nad21 New commenter

    Looking for advice please.

    I am aware that there is an entitlement of days for the death of a parent and also an entitlement of days to attend a funeral but is it possible to claim for these days even if the term has finished?
  2. LondonCanary

    LondonCanary Star commenter

    Do you mean claim them as days off in lieu because the funeral was during the holidays?
  3. nomad

    nomad Star commenter

    Am I right in interpreting this as follows?

    Your parent died and the funeral was held during the school holidays at a time when you were able to attend.

    However, you want to 'claim' by asking for paid days off work during a subsequent school term?

    Please clarify.
    strawbs, bevdex and Jesmond12 like this.
  4. catmother

    catmother Star commenter

    1st post since joining in 2006 and what a dilemma!
    harsh-but-fair and nomad like this.
  5. frustum

    frustum Star commenter

    "to attend a funeral" - ie in order to be able to go
  6. Rott Weiler

    Rott Weiler Star commenter Forum guide

    The question as you've phrased it doesn't arise because there is no such entitlement. Not unless your school has a formal policy stating that you have an entitlement, most don't. It's usually at the head's discretion. I can't imagine any head exercising their discretion in the situation you describe. You could ask and find out.
    border_walker likes this.
  7. sbkrobson

    sbkrobson Star commenter

    The time is, if at all,allowed expressly to enable you to cope with the immediate aftermath of losing a loved person. The time is not allowed expressly in order to relieve you from work.
    The question you have is associated with relieving yourself from work.
    You haven't asked us for tips on how to manage everything if a parent dies during the holidays, so therefore that is not your primary concern behind your question.

    We had a similar question once recently, in that somebody wanted to move house after the end of term, so enquired if they might be able to take their "day off for house move" in advance during term time. The theory is equally "no".

    In practice though, who knows?
    I've posted like a cold robot on this, because that is how your school will process any absence request.
    The reality is that I fully understand it takes way way more than a few days to cope with losing a loved one. But it's not me considering your application for time away, is it?
  8. meggyd

    meggyd Senior commenter

    When my dad died the deputy who organised cover said that I did not take a great deal of time off and I could have some odd days in the future if I needed for things like the solicitor or headstone ceremony. I did not take any extra days but there are some things that might be hard to arrange immediately after breavement and which most people do in office hours, all the arrangements for selling and clearing out a house for example, especially if this involves travelling.
    strawbs, afterdark and knitone like this.
  9. mothorchid

    mothorchid Star commenter

    True, Maggie and I like the sound of your deputy, who comes over as humane and kind.
    The OP is not asking for that, but seems to want a couple of extra days of holiday. I may have misunderstood, but that is how it reads to me.
  10. nomad

    nomad Star commenter

    And to me, but I wanted clarification before erupting like Vesuvius on a bad Monday morning.

    If it is the case then it demonstrates a callous disregard for the ethics of requesting compassionate leave and those colleagues who really need it.
  11. Ivartheboneless

    Ivartheboneless Star commenter

    My daughter was born during holidays. I didn't get any paternity leave.
  12. ilovesooty

    ilovesooty Star commenter

    If that is the case I couldn't agree more.
    nomad likes this.
  13. Bedlam3

    Bedlam3 Lead commenter

    There is often a lot to do following the death of a parent - sorting out their belongings and estate. I would ask school citing these things. If you don't ask you don't get. Plus you used your holiday for bereavement.
  14. nomad

    nomad Star commenter

    Laphroig and ilovesooty like this.
  15. Aquamarina1234

    Aquamarina1234 Star commenter

    I might have edited this RONG but if your parent had the good grace to depart during the hols, then lucky old you. Entitled to nothing extra. Sorry.
  16. Lazycat

    Lazycat Established commenter

    I don’t think you’ll be entitled to any time off. My Dad died when I was off sick with an unrelated problem. We dealt with his estate and funeral whilst I was off sick (I kept school informed when I had to travel to deal with all of this). It didn’t occur to me to ask for time in lieu when I returned to work.
  17. afterdark

    afterdark Lead commenter

    Poor choice of words. Rather callous.
    ROSIEGIRL likes this.
  18. Sundaytrekker

    Sundaytrekker Star commenter

    Over a period of about ten years, I had four close relatives die in school holidays. It became a family ‘joke’ that my relatives knew they had to die in the holidays. Yes, of course it ruined those holidays and took up all of my time but at least I was free to spend the time on sorting things with family. It wouldn’t have occurred to me to think I was owed time off in lieu. It’s just life (or death). Compassionate leave and Time Off policies are there because our contracts don’t give us any choice over working and holiday time. Since that period I’ve had two days of compassionate leave for other family funerals.
  19. frustum

    frustum Star commenter

    You could have done. Paternity leave doesn't have to be taken immediately after the birth - it can be taken any time within the first 56 days. Some dads opt to wait until the mother-in-law has gone home, for instance, or until the child is out of the prem baby ward. (Sadly there is, as yet, no arrangement for those whose prem babies don't make it out of hospital until later, although sometimes employers are generous about this.)
    ilovesooty and nomad like this.
  20. jubilee

    jubilee Star commenter

    Also, paternity pay is £140-98 or 90% of your average weekly pay, whichever is the lower. I doubt that many couples, at a time of extra expense with a newborn, can afford for the father to manage on £140-98 per week. At least teacher fathers can have the time unofficially during school holidays and stay on their usual pay.

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