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Dear Theo - probably end of my aspirations

Discussion in 'Jobseekers' started by oliveoil537, Jun 12, 2015.

  1. Dear Theo. I had an offer and after verbally accepting it, I pulled out later. The School re-advertised the job...I feel I made a mistake by puling out and felt like re-applying. My present HT said that if I reapply, he would not give me a reference. How could I re-gain trust of my present HT ? What might happen to my future applications - will my references be really bad? Thanks
  2. CWadd

    CWadd Star commenter


    I doubt the school you withdrew from would accept your application. There is a big difference between being turned down by a school, and later applying for another post there, and withdrawing from an actual job offer and then re-applying for the same post. That smacks of indecision, and also, taking the mick a bit. I'm not saying you are, just that that is how it may appear to the school!

    You no doubt had a good reason for withdrawing - but September is looming and it costs a lot to recruit. I really do not think the HT at the other school would welcome an application from you.

    Your HT may be unsure as to whether you will stick with an agreement - a verbal agreement is binding. I suggest you might want to speak to your line manager for their perspective and advice. Or, have a meeting with the HT. Scary? Yep, but it might build some bridges. Good luck.
  3. TheoGriff

    TheoGriff Star commenter

    You have posted this on another forum too, with more information. Here is the reply that I wrote there:

    So did you discuss them with the Head of the school where you had accepted the post? So that s/he understood and agreed that a withdrawal was the only way forward for you? In other words, it was with their agreement that you withdrew?

    In those circumstances, then the school might just be willing to consider your application again. Might. Only might.

    But otherwise, if you just broke your legal contract with them by withdrawing after accepting, then your chances of them doing anything other than laughing until their sides split at the very thought that they would consider you ever for even the most menial post in their school . . .

    In the circumstances you are lucky that you have any job at all.

    It's not just embarrassing. It was unprofessional. And really rather daft.

    Because you now are in an unhappy situation because of this. Bet you wish now that you hadn't done it . . .

    Advice? Suggestions as to what you can do now?

    You have burned your boats as far as that school is concerned. Forget any application there. Ever.

    You may also have burned them as far as some other schools are concerned, because if the word has got around We offered a post to Olive Oil, she accepted and then she broke her contract. Not to be trusted. Don't touch her with a bargepole.

    The only thing that you can do now is put your head down and work like billy-o to restore yourself in the eyes of your Head as a reliable and trustworthy employee. Because it is, as you fear, also possible that your current Head may mention this, either in a written reference or just in a conversation. After all, you have let him/her down, made him/her look stupid in the eyes of a colleague, a fellow Head, by writing a reference in support of someone who then went and did that. S/he will not be feeling happy about you doing this to his/her reputation among Heads.

    This is not the sort of advice that you were hoping for, I know. But it is the only advice that I can give.

    Apart from encouraging you to behave in a fully professional manner from now on, to avoid any similar situation.


    Meet Theo on line on the TES JobSeekers Forum, where she answers jobseeking and careers queries regularly each week.
  4. Thank you so much for taking so much time to write me an answer. I really really appreciate it.
  5. ValentinoRossi

    ValentinoRossi Star commenter

    And don't let it be the end of your aspirations. You've messed up and you know it. So take Theo's advice, pick yourself up and learn from your error.

    It's doesn't have to be the 'end' for you.

    Best of luck.
  6. TheoGriff

    TheoGriff Star commenter

    It's the weekend. Get a bottle of something nice and drown your sorrows.

    Or a LARGE bar of chocolate . . .

    Best wishes


    Meet Theo on line on the TES JobSeekers Forum, where she answers jobseeking and careers queries regularly each week.
  7. Dear Theo. After all of this I feel I need to have a work-life balance, to regain my confidence and do less but better. I also recently had off due to stress. Would it be a good time to ask to go part time from October/January or shall I wait for things to settle etc? Thank you.

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