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Dear Theo - Mrs or Ms?

Discussion in 'Jobseekers' started by rlh1285, Jul 13, 2011.

  1. Dear Theo,

    I am getting married soon, and the ongoing battle to find a job continues. Once I am married I will be proud to be Mrs! But was wondering if I ought to go for the more diplomatic Ms on application forms. Given my age (obvious) from my career history I don't want employers to think I will be off to have a baby as soon as I can.

    Perhaps I am massively overthinking it, but in these days of unemployment there is little else to do!!


  2. Diffficult one - I got by Ms but I am divorced and using my maiden name so in my mid-40s Miss wouldn't be approriate and I am not a Mrs, so it was an easy decision for me.
    I didn't get a job once as a TA at a Catholic school (this was about 10 years ago) because I talked about my own children at the interview. I was asked outright if I was married and I replied (probably rather stupidly) that I was actually divorced. I was told later that although I was a strong candidate for the job, as a divorcee I was not a good role model for the children at that that school.
    Now in hindsight I probably could have got them in to a lot of trouble for that, but having worked in a Catholic School since where staff had some (in my view) quite bigotted attitudes towards divorce, single parents and 'children from broken homes' (I heard that quote a lot in the staffrooms), I realise that actually I had a lucky escape. Funnily enough, my son went to the same schol and when people realised I was sitting there, they would say 'Of course I don;t mean your son' to which I would respond (very sarcastically), 'No of course you don't' - that backtracking of views somehow made it even worse!
  3. minnieminx

    minnieminx New commenter

    I would say use whichever title you want the children to call you.
  4. TheoGriff

    TheoGriff Star commenter

    Congrats on the imminent wedding - hope that you have chosen the right flowers/ napkin colour/ table decorations/ bridesmaid dresses/ shop for wedding list/ music / husband! [​IMG]
    I don't think that Mrs rather than Ms will make people think more about babies. They'll think that anyway, but know that this is an illegal discriminator.
    Just choose what you want to be called, and make sure that you re-read everything in the Welcome thread to get those applications really effective.
    Good luck!
    TheoGriff. Member of the TES Careers Advice Service.
    I do Application and Interview one-to-ones, and also contribute to the Job Application Workshops. We look at application letters, executive summaries and interviews, with practical exercises that people really appreciate.
  5. Thanks for all the advice! I think I'll see how it feels once I'm married, and decide from there!
  6. anon8315

    anon8315 Established commenter

    How awful!

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