Hi all, excuse the exaggerated title - although I'm not sure it is exaggerated. I am an NQT and I started my induction period, on a temporary contract in January. The school is one of the best in my county and the department, although not the same 'kind' of people as me are very nice and supportive of me in my professional judgements. The problem started when my PPA time got overlooked. Suddenly I was on a full timetable, 52 lessons a fortnight and I was struggling. I didn't have problems with behaviour managment per se, but I have all of the bottom sets and these children do push the boundaries as far as they'll go! My lessons are boring. I hate trying to get kids to do stuff they don't want to - I wanted to teach because I had a romantic notion that I would be "helping" people, but at the moment all it seems I'm doing is forcing them to do stuff they don't want to do in unimaginative and painfully boring ways. Then, last week I started imagining what it would be like to just put my stuff down on my desk and walk out of my room, walk out of the school. Every lesson I started standing up and thinking "I hate this" my classes would come in and I'd think "but I hate you!" (I know this is awful, but I'm not sparing the details here). Then, late last week one of my pupils asked me to explain something...and, I just looked at her and resented her (I'm not sure thats the word I'm looking for but it'll do) I don't understand. I've wanted to be a teacher since I was a little girl, but now I'm sitting at home and I cannot face going in to work. I have had 5 days off already (3 days in January and 2 this week) and I'm worried about a) my NQT year, b) my finances, c) my references d) my sanity....(although I'm not sure worrying about my NQT year is pertinent - it doesn't exactly look like teaching is the place for me but I don't want to burn my bridges). I am not a nasty or vindictive person. I like working with other people, I like working with young people....what is going on? I can't do this....what do I do?! I guess, what I need to know now is: what are my options?