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Cld having difficulty leaving parent in mornings.

Discussion in 'Primary' started by grussell1, May 11, 2016.

  1. grussell1

    grussell1 New commenter

    I have a Year 1 child having difficulty leaving mum in the mornings. He begins to cry and gets quite violent and chases after her when she leaves to go home. What strategies could I use to support him in the mornings? I have tried a coming in star chart that does not seem to work.

  2. caterpillartobutterfly

    caterpillartobutterfly Star commenter

    Just hold him gently, but firmly until mum is out of sight. Try to get trained in such things first if you can, but if not then just go with it.

    Has he been doing this since he started school, or has something set him off?
  3. Kartoshka

    Kartoshka Established commenter

    What are the children expected to do when they come into the classroom in the morning?

    As the previous poster says, is this new behaviour, and if so, can you work out what may have triggered it?

    I once taught a child who was anxious and tearful about leaving mum in the mornings. Between us, mum and I worked out that she was possibly worrying about what to expect when she arrived. As a solution, we tried letting her in early to "do a special job" (something simple like putting out whiteboards on each table - always the same thing each day, so she knew that was the first thing she'd be doing when she got to school). While she was doing this, she had a chance to adjust to the classroom environment without all the hustle and bustle of everyone else arriving. It seemed to work and she became less tearful quite quickly.
  4. applesauced

    applesauced New commenter

    A few months ago, I had a child strongly and physically resisting coming into school. It appeared that this might happen again more recently, so I tried the old 'good choice, **** choice' routine. I said that they had two choices. Either they could come into the classroom, see their friends and enjoy being great at the lessons, or they could stay at home doing nothing and be bored. Mum backed me and agreed that they'd be doing nothing fun at home and they decided to take the choice of coming in. I love the good choice, rubbish choice approach in general, but it was a one-off in this situation...
  5. neddyfonk

    neddyfonk Lead commenter

    I used to go with my dad ( teacher ) on school camps with eight year olds in the 1960's. We often had a lad who would get home sick and would sob endlessly in his communal tent. If he did not relent the next day he was taken home. Could have been worse: I witnessed two lads going to hospital after being hit on the head with cricket balls and one who got a knife in his leg playing splits.
  6. sparkleghirl

    sparkleghirl Star commenter

    Has he told you why he's upset when his Mum leaves or why he doesn't want to stay?

    I went through a spell of crying when my Mum left me at school. When she asked me why I apparently told her I was scared she'd forget to come and meet me later. She promised me she'd never forget and the crying stopped.
  7. grussell1

    grussell1 New commenter

    Thanks for the information. I am going to do that, as well as introduce him to my alter-ego 'Gangsta Granny' who can walk in with him in the mornings (dressed in full wig and costume). I am going to be hilarious and every morning he has to find my eye mask and false teeth in the classroom. These nifty things are the essence of teaching...*sigh*
  8. v1vam

    v1vam New commenter

    My child was like that in year 2 after a horrendous Y1 - I got her to do jobs on the way into school - call at the shop and get an occasional bar of chocolate for teacher - (he sort of loved it - but not his waistline - sorry Danny if you are reading this) it was more important to do the job than worry about being left. The routine in the classroom helped as well as the welcoming and calm, smiley teacher. After a while the tears were forgotten and routine won out and I also didn't need to buy the chocolate anymore.
  9. knowsnowt

    knowsnowt New commenter

    Find out what the child likes to do and set a reward linked to how they settle in the morning. Alternatively set them a job/task that they enjoy doing and can do independently as soon as they come in.

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