I put this on the Opinion form in the "Elephant in the room thread" but no-one seemed to want to play! Come on scientists - have a bit of fun - I'm sure you can do better than me!! PS: I make no claim as to the correctness of anything I have writ! And then, of course, there's the Chemical Table of Elephants: The Helium Elephant - need to tie a bit of string to it's leg to stop it flying off The Hydrogen Elephant - no matter where you look in the Universe - it's there! The Gold Elephant - shiny, gaudy and very heavy The Lead Elephant - not so shiny, even heavier - reinforce those floorboards The Oxygen Elephant - vital - without this one we're all done for The Sulphur Elephant - very smelly, very yellow, very crumbly WARNING: Beware of Elephants in combination - especially if it's 2Hydrogen, 4 Oxygen and a Sulphur Elephant - will eat through everything and everyone !! Chemists - do feel free to complete the Table of Elephants !