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Can't stop thinking about him.

Discussion in 'Personal' started by wellard, Jan 7, 2012.

  1. It is nearly three months since my husband walked out on me and my two daughters. During the Christmas holidays I met up with some old friends. One of my mates had invited one of his friends who is separated from his wife and we got on quite well. My problem is I can't stop thinking about him. We are now friends on Facebook and have had a few conversations, just general chit chat, although in my last message to him I asked him what he liked doing in his spare time. He has not responded since then. Is it too soon to like someone else and do you think I may have frightened him off?
  2. No, as long as we are speaking of like.
    What are you after?

  3. I would like to be friends with him. We seem to have a lot in common.

  4. I can assure you, you are sending out "oh my, find me attractive and drop dead gorgeous" signals.
    My very, very best mate, he is like a brother - when I was going through divorce, he told me "Go to bed, honey - we are not going to have sex, no matter the puppy eyes".
    That is why he is still my best friend.

  5. You are not looking for a friend wellard. As CQ said you are looking for someone to find you attractive and this is completely understandable after the knock you have had. Your confidence is very low I suspect and you want someone to want you.
    It is far too soon for a relationship; you won't be ready for a while yet - you will know when the time is right and in the meantime you can always invest in a battery operated friend!
  6. magic surf bus

    magic surf bus Star commenter

    You're quite sure you said 'what' and not 'who'?
  7. dominant_tonic

    dominant_tonic Established commenter

    How lucky you are to have friends like that CQ :)
  8. dumpty

    dumpty Star commenter

    It does sound rather classic 'on the rebound' stuff and yes, there is a good chance the man here believes that now, too. When did he separate from his wife? Perhaps he has not dealt with that yet, and your 'chasing' does indeed risk pushing him away. To be fair, it could also work in reverse and he is now coming to terms with thinking more about you, too! I do doubt this, though - no man wants the baggage of an emotionally drained woman (not saying you are, but this is how he may perceive you) or worse, feel he is being treated as a temporary sex toy. (Again, perception, not reality)
  9. Dunteachin

    Dunteachin Star commenter

    I couldn't stop thinking about Don Johnson once.
    He never knew.
  10. Wellard - you have done nowt wrong!
    You asked him what he liked doing in his spare time. Owt else? If not. Big deal.
    You felt attracted to him. Tis natural.
    You have not said that you are desperate or hoping for more (?).
    He might be busy, on holiday or just overwhelmed with things. He maybe shy and feel flattered.
    He may want "space". And "time".
    I would drop him a text in a few days' time (give him a good 4/5 days)and just say - how are things?/ How are you?- People lead such busy fraught lives nowadays and are so busy chasing their tail. He may be busy. You have not said "come round and take me - I am yours!!!".
    Always give someone a second chance, but never a third! You have made a friendly overture and nowt more. Move on with yer own life and see what happens..
    He may feel flattered but not be sure how to respond!
    Let him come to you if he wants..
  11. giraffe

    giraffe New commenter

    So he's married then? [​IMG]

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