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Can you check this letter for me please, am not English!

Discussion in 'Modern foreign languages' started by Adelaide2008, Feb 16, 2012.

  1. Hello,

    I have been asked to write a letter to parents to advise them their children will have extra sessions during their French lessons. Now I am not comfortable at all with writing in English as this is not my native language. If you could read the letter and tell me what I need to change or if I have any grammatical/structural mistakes, I will be very grateful for it. Thanks :)

    <u>Here is the letter</u>:

    Dear parents,
    <font size="3" face="Calibri">With the French GCSE examinations rapidly approaching and looking at how students achieved so far this year, we identified that your child could benefit from extra help in order to reach his/her potential grade.</font>

    We are hoping that these personalised sessions will encourage your child to remain focused and to try to reach his/her full potential.
    Yours sincerely,

    *************

    I know it is not great that is why any comments would be great :)
    Thanks in advance for your help

     
  2. noemie

    noemie Occasional commenter

    Although I'm also not a native speaker and therefore may have missed/miscorrected some of it. I changed the "remain focussed" because you could open a can of worms if you suggest the child is not focussed in lessons, and the tone of your letter was more to do with achievement rather than behaviour so best not mix the two.
    I always, always get a senior member of staff to check my letters. We have to anyway for general letters, but even an individual letter to a parent about their child gets corrected (there is often nothing to change, but still; I just don't trust myself). That's one of the reasons why they are paid more.

     
  3. Hi Noemie,

    Thanks very much for this :)
    Well your English is much better than mine :)
    I will therefore take your corrected version and submit it to my head.

    Thanks again
    Adelaide
     
  4. whapbapboogy

    whapbapboogy New commenter

    'emphasise' is spelt with an 's'- the Americanised spelling is with a 'z'. (Just a small point!) :0)
     
  5. henriette

    henriette New commenter

    Personally, I would take out the "try to" in the final bit.
     

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