After 11 years teaching I think I am about to receive my first ever non-outstanding observation grade and, if I watched my current lessons I think I would award an inadequate. I have recently returned from maternity leave. Until now I have been job sharing in a year 5 class and things have been fine. My observations have been outstanding and I've felt reasonably confident, despite my head teacher telling me she'd like to dispose of job shares if possible as she thinks they are too disruptive for children (this makes me feel under extra scrutiny and as if she might be waiting to say 'I told you so'! I know I am being over sensitive). However, a last minute change to staffing means that I have just spent my first week job sharing with a member of the SLT in a different class. I have taught these children before and it was great. However, over the last few years they have become extremely challenging. I covered them a few times on Keeping In Touch days and they were very difficult to keep in line - very angry and attention seeking behaviour for the most part (to put it crudely, in order to keep this post as short as possible). I had to send children to the head teacher and separate physical fights, especially in the afternoons. I thought, perhaps, it was because I was a change to their normal routine, however they were only slightly better for their class teacher (who is fantastic) so I didn't feel too demoralised and concerned about it. So, when I was asked to teach them on a job share basis, I was quite worried as our most recent experiences together had not been particularly positive. So I put in a lot of planning and prep and went in positive and with a plan of action! This week was challenging: they tested me more than any class ever has before and (in 3 days) I had 4 fights, 2 children leaving the room upset because they'd been sanctioned for fighting and 'battles' to get children sitting on the carpet. I feel we made great progress, e.g. a boy who'd refused to work, sit down or stop shouting abuse at others spent the third day joining in, working and being rewarded for lovely behaviour. However, I wasn't surprised that 2/3 children were still testing boundaries (to extremes) and that the afternoons were a bit like teaching EYFS in that they could have done with some continuous provision as they seemed exhausted from being closely directed all morning. There's still a very long way to go before I've got them 'tamed' and I expected that. I left feeling tired but positive. But I was told today that they were beautifully behaved for my teaching partner's 2 days (she'd SLT and has never taught them before) ...and that I'm going to be observed at least once in the next couple of weeks. I'm miserable. And terrified. And gutted that they're so good for another teacher after my experiences with them. In past jobs I've been called in to work with children with behavioural needs as it's always been a strength of mine. And I've always had outstanding feedback form lesson observations. Can I have 'lost it' on maternity leave? Perhaps I should ask to observe my teaching partner so I can learn from her success? Any advice would be gratefully received.