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Can I go back?

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by bluey9, Sep 29, 2018.

  1. bluey9

    bluey9 New commenter

    So after storming out of the classroom in tears and telling the children I didn't like them etc and how awful they are I am now in the position of wondering what to do next. Do i swallow my pride and embarrassment and get back in there or do I leave. I've only had them for 3 weeks so feel I have lost any respect. The doc has signed me off with depression for a week whilst we wait for my tablets to kick in. I just feel so embarrassed in front of the children and the staff. Has anyone been in a similar situation?
  2. Bedlam3

    Bedlam3 Star commenter

    I would say it's too early to make that decision. Wait until you feel better.
  3. mothorchid

    mothorchid Star commenter

    You are not yet well enough to even think about this issue. In fact, brooding on it might well make your depression worse.
    In a week, the medication may have kicked in and you will be able to think it all through more clearly, but a week sounds quite short time to me, and you may well need longer.
    However, in answer to the original question, I seem to recall that you had a supportive Head? If so, could you discuss the situation with them? (And do be careful, my cynicism makes me suggest you make notes of what you want to say beforehand, and make notes during any such meeting. Maybe even have the school union rep or a friend there too. Who knows?) I would think that the students were quite shocked by what happened and that their behaviour could well improve. But for your first couple of lessons, can you ask the HoD to remove one or two specific students for a week or so, thus allowing you to get a handle on the whole group. This will also isolate the difficult students and make them less likely to be a problem when they do return to your class.
    Whatever you decide, please take care.
    PS No-one ever died from embarrassment. And it's the studnets who brought you to this point who should be embarrassed.
  4. CWadd

    CWadd Star commenter

    Stop being so hard on yourself.

    A couple of years ago, I witnessed my then HOD going into what I can only describe as a screaming tantrum in front of my then Y11s. This involved calling the students idiots, slamming books around, going into her lesson next door and shouting at her class, then coming back in and shouting at my class again. A TA went to get the HoF to actually pull her out of there. Incredibly, she was strutting round the building for the rest of the day like Conor Macgregor and nothing had happened. No one ever got an apology for behaviour I can only call unhinged.

    You feel remorse and are clearly still very upset. I think you need to get better. If SLT are supportive, then please put your mind at rest.

    (Incidentally, before I'm told 'oh the HOD might read this, if they do, I don't care.)
  5. cheesypop

    cheesypop Senior commenter

    Having just read your other post and seen these were year 7 kids - yes absolutely you can (might have been different if they were year 1).

    The only question you need to answer is if you want to. And I agree with others that you might not be in the best place to answer that yet.
  6. grumpydogwoman

    grumpydogwoman Star commenter

    You seem to want to so wait a week and then do it. There you go. Decision made. Stop thinking about it. Now go and put your feet up for a week or paint the town red or whatever you want.

    Then go back. Yes, it'll be a bit awkward at first. A bit. But what did you do? Bang your head against the board and draw blood? No. Assault someone? No. Utter the most foul abuse? No.

    Take the week and stop fretting. The kids won't be bothered about it. A 5-minute wonder. Move on.
  7. koopatroopa

    koopatroopa Senior commenter

    You should have a colleague who can briefly explain to the class that you were unwell, didn't mean what you said and are now feeling better.

    The advice above to take the time off and not brood is very sensible. If you want to go back there will be a way.
    Happyregardless and mothorchid like this.

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