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Bullying making me suicidal

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by tallpoppy71, Nov 18, 2017.

  1. pittrivers

    pittrivers New commenter

    I’m on a phased return and after a few days in, I feel worse than when I originally went off sick. Wondering how I can break a limb so I don’t have to go in next week. Can’t sleep. Never felt so hopeless.
  2. bonxie

    bonxie Lead commenter

    No job is worth what you're going through. Go to see your doctor tomorrow.
  3. bonxie

    bonxie Lead commenter

    Have you got someone you can talk to tonight? It sounds like you need support now. The Samaritans phone number is 116 123. So many teachers go through this. You're not alone in finding it hard to cope with a difficult situation.
  4. phlogiston

    phlogiston Star commenter

    Sorry to hear this.
    You don't have to break a leg, you just need to phone in I'll on Monday morning and get to the GP asap. Part of the point of phased return is seeing if you're fit to return to work. If you're not ready to return, you need to take more time.
    You possibly need to contemplate alternatives to what is winding you up at the moment. Do not make any irreversible decisions while your mental state is fragile.
    In the meantime, enjoy the company of friends, late get ups and gentle exercise to get your brain back to productivity.
  5. pittrivers

    pittrivers New commenter

    I won’t be able to see a doctor on a Sunday - there’s usually about a two week wait to see a doctor at my health centre.
    pepper5 likes this.
  6. tsarina

    tsarina Occasional commenter

    I think if you phone them up and mention that you are having suicidal thoughts they will try and see you immediately. If all else fails, the NHS website says to go to A&E and tell someone you are feeling suicidal and they will help you.

    Even though you might not be able to see it at the moment, there are options, reaching out online is a good step, reaching out in person is even better. Please go see someone ASAP.


  7. carriecat10

    carriecat10 Established commenter Community helper

    One of the issues seems to be the thought of going in on Monday, so if you can make the decision not to go in and make an appointment with your GP then this may help. Surely your GP surgery has emergency appointments? If they tell you there are no appointments for several days, please insist that you need immediate support and describe how you are feeling. They should be able to arrange a phone consultation at the least. Try to go out tomorrow and do something enjoyable so you are sitting around dwelling on this for another day.
    phlogiston, pepper5 and Pomz like this.
  8. bonxie

    bonxie Lead commenter

    Your health takes precedence over going into school. Can you email now to say you're not going to be in on Monday? It may give you a feeling of relief so that you start to worry less.
  9. bonxie

    bonxie Lead commenter

    When your problems are keeping you awake, perhaps you could watch something good on TV to take your mind off things. If you know you're not going into work the next day, it's not going to matter if you stay up late binge watching a series. Orange is the New Black is good if you have Netflix.
    pepper5 likes this.
  10. Tinycat1234

    Tinycat1234 Established commenter

    You need to go to A and E or call the Samaritans.
    Good luck. Get the help you need and you’ll be ok
    phlogiston, pepper5 and thekillers like this.
  11. dunnocks

    dunnocks Star commenter

    its only a job. The sky won't fall in if you don't turn up on Monday. Don't go in, its not worth it.Best wishes, sending you a hug xx
    phlogiston, pepper5 and bonxie like this.
  12. pittrivers

    pittrivers New commenter

    Thanks everyone. I went back because I can’t apply for other jobs during sick leave - and because I I felt much better being away from Toxic Tina.
    pepper5 likes this.
  13. sunshineneeded

    sunshineneeded Star commenter

    asdangel - follow the advice above. No job is worth this. Seek medical advice asap and take strength from people who love and care about you. Sending a hug x
    bonxie likes this.
  14. caterpillartobutterfly

    caterpillartobutterfly Star commenter

    You can, with the agreement of your head, apply for other posts while on sick leave. Ask you union to negotiate this for you.
    You can self certify illness for a few days while you wait for an emergency appointment.

    When I went back in a similar circumstance, I never managed a full week before leaving. It was a hideous place. But you can leave and you can get a new post in a decent school and you can reach a light at the end of the tunnel.

    Don't keep going to a place which makes you ill.
  15. fudgeface

    fudgeface Occasional commenter

    Really sorry to hear of your experiences, asdangel. There are so many lovely people on here who give sound advice. I hope you get out in the sunshine today.

    I'm going through a bad time at the moment. My goals for today? Try not to think about school (I'm certainly not going to do any work) and cook a roast dinner for the family tonight.

    Sending best wishes. As one kind poster on here replied to me, "you are a human being and more than a job".
    Alice K, bonxie, phlogiston and 2 others like this.
  16. spinning_wheel

    spinning_wheel New commenter

    Please make an appointment to see a doctor as a matter of urgency. Tell the doctor the thoughts you are having. Don't hold back.

    I've been there. Your health and mental wellbeing is more important than a job. It's time to look after yourself.

    I was signed off and decided never to go back. My union fought my corner. Now I'm in a good place workwise and mentally too.

    Give yourself time to recover and things will get better.
  17. TES_Red

    TES_Red New commenter Staff Member

    Hello, asdangel, if you would like immediate help, your best option is to ring 999. If you want emotional support, please call the Samaritans on 116 123 (free from any phone).
    grumpydogwoman and pepper5 like this.
  18. mothorchid

    mothorchid Star commenter

    I'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling so very low.

    GP support is essential for you, but I do understand that appointments can take a while to come through. In my time I have just turned up at Reception and cried. (The tears weren't planned, but I couldn't help it.) I saw someone that day.

    In the next few hours, send an email or phone message to school to say you will NOT be in on Monday. Then try to be as gentle with yourself as possible. It is a lovely day (here, anyway) Can you go out for a walk? Is there a close friend or family member you could visit without having to put on a brave face?

    There is support for you and one day this will all be behind you.

    Take care.
  19. Cooperuk

    Cooperuk Senior commenter

    Call your GP if you can wait til tomorrow.

    If not - go to A&E today.

    Contact your union for support.

    Keep posting on here as people here care.
    grumpydogwoman, bonxie and pepper5 like this.
  20. Birdie64

    Birdie64 Occasional commenter

    Please don’t put yourself through this....been there , done that etc. Call in sick...your not well enough to make rational decisions about your future yet. Get your unions advice...rest, recuperate properly and talk here. We’ll support you ... and call the teachers network, they really helped me.
    grumpydogwoman and pepper5 like this.

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