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both parents working part-time

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by handrail, Feb 2, 2011.

  1. handrail

    handrail New commenter

    I've taken a full year maternity leave and am due to go back to work in September '11. My husband and I have a similar wage, neither of us wants to give up work completely but we don't want to miss out on the day to day raising of our son. We are both considering going part time.
    I realise we will have to make cut backs financially and we have discussed this - just wondered if anybody has done the same successfully??
     
  2. We had this very same conversation last night and it ended in a bit of a barney! OH was made redundant 3 wks after LO was born and as we had some savings and my maternity pay we thought it would be good if both of us were at home for the first few months. Trouble is that LO is now 9mths and OH hasn't even looked at the job pages! I'm getting ****** off that I am now having to use more of my savings to take my full maternity leave.
    Financially we could comfortably live off my salary without OH working at all but not vice versa - if OH got a job he would have to work full time and I would probably need to work about 2 days per week. 1/3 of my salary would then go on child care. My head knows that it makes sense for the first option but my heart knows that i will be impossible to live with and very very jealous if OH gets to stay at home and i have to go out to work. We have also just started trying for a second baby. I would then go back to work just before easter and only have to work the first month of next academic year as am only likely to carry baby for 7mths. I know that this is highly unlikely though as i would have to get pregnant immediately.
    Sorry that this is no help to you at all but writing it down straightened a few things out in my head and I am interested to hear what decisions you come to and advice others may give.
     
  3. We have done this successfully- our child only has to be looked after the max two days a week, I think it's lovely to share the child care and no one misses out! I also think the financial cut backa are worth it nothing replaces the time of watching your children growing up. I think you would maybe get more time for each other as well. The nights I have had to work after school I have virtually ignored other half after childs bedtime by only working part time i have had evenings free to spend time together.
    Whilst not everyone is in the position to work part time my partner and I made the decision before child was born to do this. For me there is plenty of time in the future to work full time and bring the "extra" money in, but you do not get the chance to relive your sons childhood. So what if my child doesn't have a buggaboo or wear monsoon etc. I think any child would be much happier to have both parents quality time then the material trappings.
    If you can work part time and be comfortable with the cutbacks then I would say go ahead don't even give it a second thought.
     
  4. Wow. That is a very privileged position to be in Andi. I think it's a no-brainer personally. I do think he should at least show willing though!! I've just had a very interesting conversation with a friend who has two toddlers; she is going back to work for three months and then quitting. She says they will be quite broke but it will be worth it. I really don't think we could afford for me to give up work at all- we have a big house and an enormous mortgage- wish it was as simple for me to say that time watching my girl grow up is more important than money. Oh and number two is due in September all going well!!
     
  5. handrail

    handrail New commenter

    Thank you both for your replies. What you have said makes a lot of sense and I feel very positive about it now. Yes there will be cut backs but to be honest we really don't spend alot anyway - we rarely go out (even before LO) and neither of us drink - the main thing we spend money on is going out for coffees and to cafes which is a luxury anyway and would definitley be worth doing this less in order to work part time and look after our son.
    I'm hoping to go 3 days a week and OH has two 0.5 posts anyway within the same company so will be easy enough for him to drop the post which pays least. MIL is available to look after LO one day a week so hopefully this will all fit together.
    Right, well I've got my meeting with the head teacher friday to discuss going back so lets see what happens...
     
  6. Good luck handrail, sounds like the perfect scenario! x
     
  7. handrail

    handrail New commenter

    Thanks clematis, we must have posted at the same time. Sounds perfect but we'll see if it works out... will let you know x
     
  8. We're considering the same, dropping one day each (although I'd love to drop two!) but I'm finding it really difficult to calculate what it'll mean financially!
     
  9. It is all so bloomin complicated, isn't it? I am so confused about all the credits and stuff.
    I'm quite lucky in that I'm just going to be doing some private tuition- MIL means free baby sitting..but I am, basically, a stay at home mum. but I would love my husband to work part time and have her for a day or two he misses out on so much....It isn't really an option for his job as he has to be at the office really... and he has better pay.

    If you can do it, I would!
     
  10. Unfortunately I'm the one with the higher wage!
     
  11. handrail

    handrail New commenter

    It is complicated and is going to be a drastic change in wages for us but we've talked and talked about it and are sure it's what we both want. Just hope I haven't done my sums wrong. I'm quite sure my headteacher will say no tomorrow and spoil my plans - then I will have to get thinking again.
     

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