My ex and I separated a few years ago. It's my son's 6th birthday soon. He normally spends a weeknight at my house and Saturday nights as well. His birthday "morning" is on a morning he would wake up at my house during the week before going to school. My ex and I have planned a family meal after school and he has a party at the weekend. There is no animosity between my ex and myself - we get on really well. Now comes the problem. She would like our son to be "in his bed at home" on his birthday - which I can see. But for the last 2 Christmases and birthdays he has always been "in his bed at home" and my ex has always been there for the excitement of waking up and opening presents. I'm not sure what to do - she is very attached to our son (obviously) but I would really like to be there when he wakes up. But on the other hand, I bet he would like to be in his own bed at home. I haven't asked him what he would like to do as I don't want to put any emotional pressure on him. And his emotional needs come first - which probably answers my question. Any advice / experience from parents in similiar situations? And before any one says "Well this is what you get if you leave so it's all your fault", it was a mutual decision.