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Bereavement, absence and pay...can anyone advise?

Discussion in 'Personal' started by fantastischfish, May 20, 2011.

  1. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    As seome may have read, i recently lost a very close friend which is dveastatingespecially compounded by the loss of a beloved pet the same day. I took yesterday off and was prepared to lose pay. Want to do the same today as have had an awful night of crying and being ill.

    However, someone mentioned that taking a day unpaid today would also lead to deduction of weekend days too.

    Can anyone advise? Will i lose 1/195th or 3/365th? Tempted to say i don't care either way as i dont feel able to work, but i suppose i have to think of the mortgage.
     
  2. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    As seome may have read, i recently lost a very close friend which is dveastatingespecially compounded by the loss of a beloved pet the same day. I took yesterday off and was prepared to lose pay. Want to do the same today as have had an awful night of crying and being ill.

    However, someone mentioned that taking a day unpaid today would also lead to deduction of weekend days too.

    Can anyone advise? Will i lose 1/195th or 3/365th? Tempted to say i don't care either way as i dont feel able to work, but i suppose i have to think of the mortgage.
     
  3. Eva in our place you are entitled to five days compassionate which would cover this, I think.
     
  4. As it was not a close family member it is at the discretion of your Head, I suppose. Not sure about the pay issue - perhaps a call to your union to check?. When my closest friend died, I was allowed the day of the funeral, paid, but that was it.
    Condolences for your loss.
     
  5. Middlemarch

    Middlemarch Star commenter

    You really need to find out what your school's policy on leave for bereavement is, as they vary so widely - others can tell you about theirs, but it may well be different.

     
  6. TheoGriff

    TheoGriff Star commenter

    If you are ill, you are not fit to go to school; you can take sick leave with self-certification. Taking unpaid leave is unnecessary; time to pull yourself together again after this terrible blow is.
    _____________________________________________________________

    TheoGriff. Member of the TES Careers Advice Service.

    I
    do Application and Interview one-to-ones, and also contribute to the
    Job Application Workshops. We look at application letters, executive
    summaries and interviews, with practical exercises that people really
    appreciate.

    The Job Seminars are all sold out, I'm afraid, but Julia is planning some more later on.


    A new SLT seminar is available now on 22 May <u>www.tesweekendworkshop32.eventbrite.com</u>, and another is planned for 18 June.


    E-mail Julia on advice@tsleducation.com for how to book a meeting with me personally.

    Look forward to seeing you!



     
  7. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    Thanks for the advice. I think that I should 'qualify' (for want of a better word) as 'sick' as it isn't exactly a huge leap to see that grief can cause illness: I have hardly eaten, hardly slept and have barely stopped crying all day. Do i ask for a self certification form from work? I imagine I'll be in trouble on monday: a lot of pressure was put on me to come in today.
     
  8. I sincerely hope not Eva. Thinking of you.
     
  9. kibosh

    kibosh Star commenter

    Eva, I really hope your reasons for being sick have been met with empathy if not at least the correct regulations your school would normally employ under such matters.
    I am a supply teacher and cancelled one days work in plenty of time, infact when I phoned in at 8am the person who hires me (business manager) wasn't even at work yet. I left a message with office staff. Our cat came back to us at 5.30am of the next working day and i phoned in to let the school know that I would be in When I turned up at school I was met with lowered eyes and an extremely cold shoulder. People just don't understand. I lost a day pays (voluntarily, I know) because I was not able to turn up. If my child had gone missing or been kidnapped I'm pretty sure i would have met with a different response!!!!!!. I had to change my time-sheet. as I'd filled it in at the start of the working week. I took it to my business manager and said 'Just to let you know I'm taking yesterday out, yes?'
    'Oh no, you were off sick so that's a blah de bah'
    I look puzzled and hopeful.
    'Oh that's right you weren't sick, were you. . . . . . . . . [​IMG]'
    So what exactly do you call screaming in emotional agony, vomiting, crying etc?
    Christ, I've been on a right rant here, but it really annoys me that bereavement, whether it be for family, friends or pets, be viewed as something akin to skiving.
     
  10. lilachardy

    lilachardy Star commenter

    You do whatever you normally do when you've been off sick!
     
  11. kibosh

    kibosh Star commenter

    Sorry. I should clarify, just incase anyone was wondering (I doubt they were) my previous post was meant to be more empathetic than realistically supportive.
     
  12. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    I came home from work on thurs as was in tears and unable to teach. I was told if i went home i wouldn't be paid. I rang in this morning and left a message saying i was unwell. However, i suspect it may have been counted as unpaid compassionate leave like i assume it was on thursday. Will find out on Monday.
     
  13. kibosh

    kibosh Star commenter

    Oh! If you were my daughter i would be telling you to come with me. Cuddles, love, nice food, distractions, total pampering etc. From what you have said about the wknd previously, I am concerned .
    Eva, what is happening this wknd?
     
  14. i'd take it as sick leave. if you were in such a state you could not stand in front of a class then you were mentally too ill to teach.
    i'm sure your GP would give you a back dated sick note if your school refuse to pay it as sick leave.
    i'm sorry for your loss x
     
  15. I am appalled at how your school is treating you ((Eva))
    My advice - for what it's worth - would be to book an appointment with your doctor for Monday and, as the above poster said, get a back-dated sick note. Because what you've been through this week HAS made you ill.
    You're clearly a very strong individual but this is the time you need to look after you. I too am sorry for your loss and hope that your doctor treats you with more compassion than your employers have.
     
  16. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    Thank you everyone. I have come away with my parents to their caravan-come-mini-bungalow for a couple of nights. I feel a lot better, but i imagine its probably a case of 'out of sight, out of mind'. Have been out for sea front hikes, to the gym and pool, and have had a mooch around the second hand book shops...six books for 13 quid.

    Am heading home tomorrow after an indian head massage at the spa. Will see what is said on monday. If I'm disciplined for taking time off, or there's a suggestion of not paying me, I'll visit the GP. Good to hear that most think i have the right to sick pay. Should it also be sick pay for THursday when i came home from work? I was told that would be unpaid LOA unless it was an immediate family member.
     
  17. If you tell them you are grieving for your cat, you won't get much sympathy.
    Your friend was not a close family member.
    You may or may not get compassionate leave - but I doubt it.
    You need to get yourself written off sick. And not mention the cat.
     
  18. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    Thanks cq. If it was put down as compassionate leave i know it would be unpaid, although i do actually feel that i have been too unwell to work. I certainly couldn't have performed my job without being unfair to the kids.

    I don't wish to sound like I'm trying to get around the rules at all. I just am expecting my schook to be a bit difficuly thats all, i just want to approach them from an informed position.
     
  19. Eva - my sympathies for your losses. A colleague of mine had a similar situation - a close friend died suddenly following an accident. She didn't go into school and was emailed by the deputy head to say it would be unpaid. She went to the GP and was signed off with stress due to grief. The school had to pay her.
    So I would definitely advise that you see your GP and say how upset you are and use that if they try not to pay you. Teaching isn't the kind of job you can do when upset - some jobs it's easier if you need to go off and have a cry or have an easier day but teaching isn't like that.
     
  20. I agree with the above. And I wouldn't go into school until you've seen your GP. Call in sick, book an appointment (emergency if necessary) for tomorrow and get yourself signed off.
     

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