1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest, welcome to the TES Community!

    Connect with like-minded professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.

    Don't forget to look at the how to guide.

    Dismiss Notice

Aspergers student being rude? How do i deal with it?

Discussion in 'Special educational needs' started by ME80, Jan 25, 2012.

  1. I teach an aspergers student AS Business Studies in a sixth form college and he is very rude and offensive to me and questioning my teaching ability and subject knowledge.He is only taking as he needed to do 4 alevels so 'take business'.
    Todays comments included I am bad teacher, i dont know my subject, he could do a better job than me teaching, he doesnt see why he should attend lessons as he could learn the whole syllabus in 2 weeks and do well in the exams and that he and no one else learns anything in my lessons. He refused to do his homework last night as he was too busy helping in running a business which is something i know nothing about.
    I had an incident with him on the last day of the autumn term where he refused to do the work set as it was boring and pointless and he had done it already and wasnt going to do it and then starting implying im a bad teacher, i treat him differently in a bad way and that had something on me that he was going to use against me.
    He also complained at October half term that my lessons are too loud and that they should be taught in silence - the class should be silent at all times.
    He isnt doing as well as he could be in my subject because he doesnt listen to feedback as to how to improve his written work. His support worker claims there are no issues in his other subjects - physics, maths and electronics but i know there is such as not following instructions in maths and not writing down workings out, not being accurate in electronics etc etc - other students i teach have told me that he argues with other teachers in his other lessons.
    Any advice on what to do? I keep being told its his aspergers but he knows what is right and wrong and if it was any other student they would be in disiplinary no questions. I dont see why I should have to put up with being treated like this.
     
  2. I teach an aspergers student AS Business Studies in a sixth form college and he is very rude and offensive to me and questioning my teaching ability and subject knowledge.He is only taking as he needed to do 4 alevels so 'take business'.
    Todays comments included I am bad teacher, i dont know my subject, he could do a better job than me teaching, he doesnt see why he should attend lessons as he could learn the whole syllabus in 2 weeks and do well in the exams and that he and no one else learns anything in my lessons. He refused to do his homework last night as he was too busy helping in running a business which is something i know nothing about.
    I had an incident with him on the last day of the autumn term where he refused to do the work set as it was boring and pointless and he had done it already and wasnt going to do it and then starting implying im a bad teacher, i treat him differently in a bad way and that had something on me that he was going to use against me.
    He also complained at October half term that my lessons are too loud and that they should be taught in silence - the class should be silent at all times.
    He isnt doing as well as he could be in my subject because he doesnt listen to feedback as to how to improve his written work. His support worker claims there are no issues in his other subjects - physics, maths and electronics but i know there is such as not following instructions in maths and not writing down workings out, not being accurate in electronics etc etc - other students i teach have told me that he argues with other teachers in his other lessons.
    Any advice on what to do? I keep being told its his aspergers but he knows what is right and wrong and if it was any other student they would be in disiplinary no questions. I dont see why I should have to put up with being treated like this.
     
  3. At his age I think you should sit him down with his support worker at a quiet time without other pupils there and explain to him that you are finding his remarks rude and that they are inapproriate. He may not understand that you are finding these remarks hurtful but he should at his age and intelligence understand that he is behaving inappropriately if you explain it to him.
    Maybe if he really can't stop himself then you could direct him in future to express these remarks only to his support teacher quietly or even write them down in a spare notebook to be looked at (or not!) at the end of a lesson.
    Child writes "You are a bad teacher"
    You write " I am sorry you feel like that. Could you please look at pages 12 to 24 in your text book to prepare for next lesson."
    Maybe its just an attention seeking thing?
     
  4. Oh and I agree that if this carries on that you should go to your line manager and speak to parents.
    And my suggestions are just suggestions! Feel free to ignore them!
     
  5. I am sorry you are being spoken to like this. Some students with Aspergers come across as very egotistical as it sounds like this boy does (saying he could pass the course in 2 weeks and do a better job of teaching it than you)-this IS because of the social impairment side of the condition but it does not mean that they should be treated differently to their other peers who don't have Aspergers. I have Aspergers myself and went through mainstream education all the way to university. When I inadvertently offended someone, I was informed of this very bluntly and I believe that this was the best way forward. When I attended an AS support group at university, I was shocked at how rude one of the other students was. It transpired that he had never been informed all the way through mainstream school that some of his comments were offensive to others. Now he leads a lonely lifestyle because so many people have become so fed up of constantly being derided by him. Another possibility is that he is one of those tiny proportion of people with Aspergers (who I dislike because they make acceptance so difficult for the rest of us) who genuinely believe that having Aspergers means that they are of superior intelligence to everyone else and so don't need to care about the effects their comments have on other people. The man I mentioned above is one of these. He constantly says things such as, "If it wasn't for us with AS, the world would still be in the Dark Ages. NTs (neurotypical people) owe me!" and, "Why would I want to be normal? To have inferior intelligence? No thanks!" No matter how many times it is pointed out to him that this is an offensive mindset not to mention very simplistic particularly as only a minority of people with Aspergers are gifted enough to actually make a change in technology, he continues to say such things because he genuinely believes them. He was bullied at school and I think this sort of attitude helped him initially because he felt that they were just bullying him because he was misunderstood but now it causes a lot of ill feeling towards him from people both with and without Aspergers. I don't like him because he makes acceptance harder for those of us with AS who don't think like that. As these people with Aspergers tend to be the most vocal, people without Aspergers tend to think that they represent everybody with Aspergers. Anyhow, I would do what the others suggest and sit down and talk to him with his support worker present and explain how he is making you feel. If he continues after this, tell him that this is a post 16 setting and, as such, it is not compulsory to attend so, if he wants to quit the course, that's his own choice. I hope things work out for you soon.
     
  6. Well it got worse - he has now put a complaint in about me and the way i treat him - he thinks its unfair. He was rude again in the next lesson so after refusing to do 2 tasks i asked him to leave the lesson with his support worker but he was to complete all the work I had set. He left but i know he hasnt done the work because the complaint said that he would do no work every again for me ans his support worker said he had refused to do it as he was upset because he thought i was talking about him before the lesson when another student was talking to me about something else.
    Anyway the management (my HOD and the head of faculty) have been great but the learning support are blaming me for everything - i shouldnt over stimulate him (i asked him to do a worksheet), he doesnt know what he is saying (yet a complaint is being heard and taken seriously), he doesnt know right from wrong (yet can criticise me and other students in the class) and doesnt do this in other lessons (yet is rude to other tutors and says he knows more than they do).
    I am upset by the fact that it seems he can do what he wants, says what he wants etc without any come back. A number of students in his class have now complained to my HOD about him but yet learning support wont listen to the fact that he has done anything wrong. I have infact been called worse than what he has called me (which isnt acceptable but was dealt with via detention, disiplinary etc)
    Dad cant be involved as Dad is blind and also has aspergers and mum has left them both so isnt around.
    I am meeting the head of learning support on Wednesday (only after I will have taught him again and just before I am due to teach him for a double session) and am preparing a list of questions including "how can i discipline him?" as every time I do he complains about me. Learning support have also criticised me for saying "if you know more than me...." which was directed at the whole class -they have twisted this to say that i asked him directly if he thought if i was a good teacher!! I would never ask any student if i was a good teacher.
    I have also spoken to my union rep who has said if it develops further he will support me.
    I am so exhausted by all of this and have hardly slept since it happened until today and have slept for most of the day.
    Thank you for the positive responses - just so frustrating as I have never had treatment like this in 4 years of teaching and have taught in far worse places (the college i am at is in a middle class area, no real behavioural problems etc compared to really deprived areas with bad behaviour including an exclusion unit one lesson a week). My students have also been great as well and have me smile over the last few days.
    Im hoping for a good response next week from the head of learning support but will see what happens. Will keep you all posted

     
  7. This is when it started when i said it wasnt right to say this to me.
    Your suggestions are great and what I have tried to do but have back fired on me!!
     
  8. cup

    cup

    I'm so sorry that you are having these problems.
    As a mother of a son who has Aspegerges who attended college and found things very difficult. I'm also a Primary school teacher in a special needs school which specialises in autism.
    Deep breathe..
    The comments he makes are probably a cover for him not coping with college life, sometimes pupils with Aspergeres make very loud comments about teachers, they can form a judgement and it is difficult for them to change their mind.
    You can't control them, you can only control how you react to their behaviour. It is best to say " that's not Ok, but it is ok to ." give direction on how you would like them to speak to you and praise for the desired behaviour.
    If it is possible break down the tasks you would like them to do in easy managable chunks.. homework can be a real problem with Asperges as they often assosciate college work for college .. not home, and if he is unable to have support at home from da no motivation and no direction will just create more problems.
    Use the fact that he is interested in the business side of things and find out what's in it for him and use that to help direct him in his work, make time in lessons where homework tasks can be completed.. that way he will have done them in college not at home.
    It is very challenging to teach pupils that push our buttons, but remember you are the adult, control your reactions feed teh positive behaviour.. don't get into battles... good luck

     
  9. As a SEN HT with a lot of exp in ASD and Aspergers I totally agree with the remarks below:
    We don't set homework, this can be very difficult at A level. I have taught AS and A2 Bus St to those on the autistic spectrum including Aspergers and it isn't easy. Its actually one of the hardest qualifications out there. I have some suggestions
    His business is probably very interesting to him. If he has any interests they are likely to be quite intensely followed to the near exclusion of everything else. Use these to differentiate the syllabus. Aspie's will, in general, only do what they are interested in and his motivation for doing your subject doesn't sound strong in the first place so you may need to create additional interest.
    If this battle is one you lose take heart from the comment above, it is absolutely true. It is very difficult for someone with Aspergers to change their opinion of anyone and your student may hold a grudge past the point at which you can be the person to help them. He is acting out because he is struggling.
    His other subjects are very different to BS and he will find it very difficult to abstract. For instance Physics is very much a wrong or right subject. It deals in absolutes or at least theories with proofs. BS contains quite a lot of abstraction and invention. Concepts like Guerilla Marketing, the theories behind People and Operations Management, Management styles etc will ask him to do something he may find impossible, which is to imagine himself in another position or to do something other than is his natural instinct. It is quite likely he would see staff motivation as simply a matter of paying them therefore they should do the job. He will have an overdeveloped sense of right and wrong and need a firmly delineated hierarchy through which to understand the world. He may feel more motivated himself for being told how well he is doing and given praise but it would likely not occur to him that this would be the same for other people and should form part of good management practice. Sorry this is so detailed but I have been where you are at the moment and it is a very hard subject to teach the Asperger's mind. Most people don't realise this because they think business is all accounting and marketing but even these can cause problems.
    You are almost certainly getting the tongue lashing because of his difficulties with the subject. This is something he cannot articulate and may not even be able to identify as the source of his negativity, he is not completely in touch with his own emotions. Don't be afraid to suggest that his particular strengths may not lie in this direction.
    Feel free to pm me if you want a chat...I am quite happy to discuss his subject specific problems as I suspect these may lay at the heart of what you are experiencing.

     

Share This Page