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arrogant male student disrespecting female teacher - Advice please

Discussion in 'Behaviour' started by gerryfood, May 23, 2011.

  1. Hello, I am after some help dealing with a year 7 boy who seems to of taken a disliking to me. I teach a mixed class (4 year 7 students, 2 year 8 students) not a lot I know but feels like there is 40 in the class.
    Most students seem to be challenging, but I have narrowed it down to two boys, both exhitbiting difficult behaviours. One i can deal with as he has been identified with ADHD and is constantly talkative, distracting and of cource disrespectful. It is really the other student that is really getting to me. I have discussed with other teachers at my school and they have informed me that he has a real problem with women, especially women in power. (I am new to this school) I work for the exclusive bretherens and other teachers tell me that they do not value women as much as men.
    His behaviour today; talking, constant backchatting, disrupting others, not following simple requests and/or taking sooooooo long that i have to repeat and repeat my request, or just simple ignoring. Today after I had had enough I requested he bring his diary to me on my desk to write a note home to parents, and he threw it at me!!! And just sat back down as if I was meant to pick it up. I didnt and again requested he stand up, pick it up and place it on my desk.
    After refering it to the teacher in charge of behaviour, I was told that there is sometimes not a lot the school can do. I am very concerned to hear this, especially from someone in charge.
    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! How do I deal with this as it is really getting to me and it seems that the other students dont care and think thats it all funny.

    Advice advice advice, any please,
    Gratefull in advance.
     
  2. Speak to him one-on-one. Ask him if he would feel more comfortable if his parents sat next to him in class to help him control his behaviour, or if he would feel awkward being the only child in the school that was unable to cope without this?
    You won't be able to follow this through, but it does raise a huge question mark in the minds of the child as to the lengths you will go to.
    I would phone home rather than write - make the connection verbally.
     
  3. What sanctions/techniques have you tried so far? Personally I would go through energies to resolve this myself before I went to the parents, you need to be very clear in your expectations with him. I'm not suggesting that you aren't but more enquiring into what is happening as your post is not clear as to how you are currently trying to deal with this. What did you do when he threw the book at you, apart from insist he pick it up? If there are no consequences for his bad behaviour then whether or not his parents are called it will continue. You shouldn't be allowing him to talk over you, chat back etc. Your first step is to assert yourself with him. What have you tried so far to pull him into line?
     
  4. I would also personally avoid threats that you know you can't carry out as suggested by another poster - with all due respect. Unless of course you know the parents well. If you suggest them coming in and sitting next to him it could turn in a direction you don't want it to if the parents are not the most 'pro-school' you have ever seen. They could complain and more importantly if little Johnnie goes home and reports what you have said for them to respond with 'rubbish, she can't make us do that', you may end up with more egg on your face and him treating you more like a joke which would be detrimental to the relationship you are trying to build. I feel assertion is the key here and consistency across all who teach him in the discipline area.
     
  5. [quote="minnieminx" : quote user="vehar": Why doesn't anyone tell the OP to use 'presence'? (see other thread) : Because they may not have any? It isn't something you can just acquire overnight. Read the other thread! quote]


    I was being heavily… and obviously unsuccessfully…. sarcastic. To me, the idea of assuming that someone doesn’t have any presence, is akin to suggesting that they’re in some way inferior… lacking in something that more favoured mortals have. There are many suggestions on the other thread for ‘building up’ presence, but most of them merely mean ‘building up a relationship as ‘strict-but-fair’, ‘a strong personality’ , or however the teacher concerned would like to see him/herself. But this isn’t ‘presence’; it’s just a situation-specific phenomenon, and doesn’t necessarily carry over into other situations, such as going into a new school, class, facing a new audience, whatever. Sure, there are certain tricks that can be learnt, but neither do these constitute ‘presence’; they’re part of a kind of manipulative, crowd-control mechanism that’s often taught to salespersons. A teacher shouldn’t have to feel that s/he has to maintain or control people in order to get them to learn. If we have to, then the problem isn’t going to be solved by superficial techniques located in the behaviour of the teacher. If the kids don’t want to learn, then we should be trying to find out why by looking very closely at how young people live these days, what the content of their education is, and what it should be. It certainly shouldn’t be up to the teacher’s ‘presence’ whether they learn or not.
    (I did answer before, but my post must have gone astray)
     

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