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Are manners going out of fashion?

Discussion in 'Personal' started by oldsomeman, Oct 16, 2015.

  1. oldsomeman

    oldsomeman Star commenter

    Traveling today and as usual when i get on the bus i say good morning and thank you...something i have always done.
    yet as i watched i realised i must be an exception......15 others got on.no one smiled, uttered a word,or even looked at the driver.Move to the tube and there people have atrocious manners....just barge past nearly knocking the wife over,and she gave them a tarty report, force your way in and swing around with a bag on their back,....., but ahead.escalators are grounds of glumness,silent glances of dislike and knock out the way anyone who stops you from progressing.
    No wonder out country is a dismal place when we have no time for the simple niceties of life like care,compassion and manners.
     
  2. InkyP

    InkyP Star commenter

    I'd say most people round here are pleasant but I don't live anywhere near London.
     
  3. foxtail3

    foxtail3 Star commenter

    Most people thank the bus driver, in my experience, which, admittedly, is limited. It's people with backpacks that irritate IMO. They swing round and nearly tske your ear off and take up far too much room.
     
  4. Flere-Imsaho

    Flere-Imsaho Star commenter

    Is our country a dismal place?
     
  5. RedQuilt

    RedQuilt Star commenter

    I suppose it might feel that way if we were to only focus on the negative aspects but my experience is that there are lots of wonderful people out there and lots of opportunities to make life really rather good.
     
    ilovesooty and bombaysapphire like this.
  6. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

    It's London... sums it up really.
     
    kibosh and coffeekid like this.
  7. Noja

    Noja Senior commenter

    I would say the opposite - we are overly mannered, apologising for being in the way when someone knocks you etc. Our students thank the bus drivers each day so I think it might be a London thing.
     
    kibosh and coffeekid like this.
  8. maurice-r

    maurice-r Established commenter

    Sometimes there is a fine line between being well-mannered and being assertive.Sadly, In the stresses of life, it is often easier for many people to resort to self-righteous rudeness.
     
  9. BobbyPhilips

    BobbyPhilips Established commenter

    In London, it's generally lone travelers going to work. Most cities are like that,
     
  10. oldsomeman

    oldsomeman Star commenter

    Its not just bus drivers. i have often given instructions to help and folks just march off.or taken time to chat to folk even if only for a few minutes.often with a smile....and its amazing how many are happy that you spoke to them and indeed are grateful.
    I watch them when the come into my local chippy..for every one who has what i term basic manners..there is a lot who sort of grunt their order,grab the goods pay and vanish without even a thanks.The turkish owner just looks and shrugs his shoulders at their behaviour.
    On the other hand i agree there are some who are nice, who seem to able to request goods or services with a formal request.......but not the ones i saw this morning.
     
  11. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

     
  12. anotherauntsally

    anotherauntsally Lead commenter

    I don't tend to use the bus in London but I'm always surprised by how many young men and women rushing for the tube before/after work offer to carry my case up/down the stairs for me when there's no escalator. I'm inundated with offers every time I go there. Years ago, this caused me to revise my opinion of young Londoners.

    Where I live, those who don't thank the bus driver tend to be the exception.
     
  13. maurice-r

    maurice-r Established commenter

    I hate the young men (and it's always young men) who sweep everyone aside on a descending escalator as they run down to their Tube trains: rude, self-important and downright dangerous.
     
  14. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

    @anotherauntsally

    Well, I'm going to London in a week so I shall look forward to experiencing this new wave of human kindness.
     
    Rhoswen77 and anotherauntsally like this.
  15. anotherauntsally

    anotherauntsally Lead commenter

    @lanokia
    I'm not saying they'll rush to help a strapping lad like you. I don't think you'll be able to pass yourself off as old and frail too easily, so don't get your hopes up.

    Have a lovely time in London. I'm jealous. :)
     
    lanokia and Rhoswen77 like this.
  16. grumpydogwoman

    grumpydogwoman Star commenter

    Most people round here are very well-mannered. Children included.

    I'll pull my dogs to one side for cyclists and they nearly always thank me. People of all ages.

    London! *shudders*
     
  17. Camokidmommy

    Camokidmommy Established commenter

    I used to live on the outskirts of a town where everyone rushed everywhere and no-one smiled at anyone. It wasn't London, either.
    Now I live in a place where many people greet each other as they pass - a nod, smile or word. I don't know who many of these people are, but I'm much happier. Maybe I'm just easily pleased!!
    As for manners - they are alive and kicking in my class - they don't cost anything and make life a little more pleasant! Some parents could learn a thing or two from their children...
     
    RedQuilt and grumpydogwoman like this.
  18. Rhoswen77

    Rhoswen77 Established commenter

    I wish people wouldn't be so down on London all the time - or so it seems to me. It's no less grouchy than any other big city and that reputation it has gained is largely unfair.
    I have always found it fine, people fine etc. it's a gorgeous city with a vibe like none other - even New York.
     
    lanokia and anotherauntsally like this.
  19. anotherauntsally

    anotherauntsally Lead commenter

    Why?
     
  20. oldsomeman

    oldsomeman Star commenter

    Matterof debate Rhoswen.i have lived on the outskits some 38 years and over time the manners have gone down.I do admit there are some fine folk.many young men see my wife nn the tube and give her a seat....and they always get thanked. Certain groups dont and yet in early morning ,as we were this morning. they dont budge an inch. You get your seat and stay in it while you eat your breakfast,do your eyes,sleep, etc etc.its not that we have not encountered kindness and manners..just that many seem to forget them, The biggest curse is often the mobile which they have glued to their phone and ignore all and sundry.
    However , if i have the courtesy to say thank you its nice to at least get a smile or some comment..The bus driver seemed quite shocked that my wife and I said good morning and please and thnk you to him this morning.
     

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