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Angry parent - advice please?

Discussion in 'Primary' started by janem1, Mar 5, 2011.

  1. I have a post-16 student who is undeachieving across the subject. They have never approached me for any help or for any meeting to broach any worries or receive some extra coaching, despite it being offered on many occasions. They are a quiet student and I have thought for some time things weren't right but when I asked if everything was ok they always answered yes. I have mentioned to their tutor that I was worried about their progress.
    Her mother asked to see me at parents evening and within 2 mins I was quite firmly in the firing line. Any attempt by me to discuss their poor progress or ask about how much independant study was being done was firmly side-stepped. Apparently I have put their child down, that they feel stupid and can't ask me for help. The parent fired questions at me and then interrupted and talked over me, said as 'the service provider to their customer I should be delivering a better service and also take on bored that I need to change' . When I said that in my observations I always scored 'outstanding' for student relationships they said that they were aware that a teachet could fake anything for an observation'! At one point I had spent 20 mins being cut across and talked over so the next time they did it I kept talking (actually to the student) and they said that when someone is rude and cuts in (ie them) then I should shut up and listen I expressed how sorry I was for anything I may have done that that made the student feel that way, how sorry I was that they felt they couldn't approach me and I offered a meeting with the HOD or the student a change of class. They said they didn't want to change class and they then said the reason the hadn't come before was that I was (qoute) " a really lovely person and I ddin't want to hurt your feelings'. I asked at the end of the meeting (40 mins in a 10 min slot) if they wanted to talk to the Head and they said they would leave it for now.
    I obviously now need to take their comments on board assess how I teach that class and deal with this student in the future, but I am concerened that I am now firmly 'under their spotlight' and one wrong word or look on my part is likely to bring Mummy or Daddy straight back in.
    I'm not sure what to do next - I have spoken to my Head of Subject who suggested they talk to the student. I'm concerend that the relationship may now not be salvagable and I will be on tenterhooks every time I teach that class - should I move her to another class? ( I have taken on students who didn't get on with other teachers). I'm also an NQT - should I speak to my co-ordinator (the VP) about this?
    Sorry for the ramble but this is my first horrible experience ( and it the exact opposite of all other parent experiences I have ever had) and it's left me a bit shaken. Any advice appreciated
    Thanks
     
  2. I have a post-16 student who is undeachieving across the subject. They have never approached me for any help or for any meeting to broach any worries or receive some extra coaching, despite it being offered on many occasions. They are a quiet student and I have thought for some time things weren't right but when I asked if everything was ok they always answered yes. I have mentioned to their tutor that I was worried about their progress.
    Her mother asked to see me at parents evening and within 2 mins I was quite firmly in the firing line. Any attempt by me to discuss their poor progress or ask about how much independant study was being done was firmly side-stepped. Apparently I have put their child down, that they feel stupid and can't ask me for help. The parent fired questions at me and then interrupted and talked over me, said as 'the service provider to their customer I should be delivering a better service and also take on bored that I need to change' . When I said that in my observations I always scored 'outstanding' for student relationships they said that they were aware that a teachet could fake anything for an observation'! At one point I had spent 20 mins being cut across and talked over so the next time they did it I kept talking (actually to the student) and they said that when someone is rude and cuts in (ie them) then I should shut up and listen I expressed how sorry I was for anything I may have done that that made the student feel that way, how sorry I was that they felt they couldn't approach me and I offered a meeting with the HOD or the student a change of class. They said they didn't want to change class and they then said the reason the hadn't come before was that I was (qoute) " a really lovely person and I ddin't want to hurt your feelings'. I asked at the end of the meeting (40 mins in a 10 min slot) if they wanted to talk to the Head and they said they would leave it for now.
    I obviously now need to take their comments on board assess how I teach that class and deal with this student in the future, but I am concerened that I am now firmly 'under their spotlight' and one wrong word or look on my part is likely to bring Mummy or Daddy straight back in.
    I'm not sure what to do next - I have spoken to my Head of Subject who suggested they talk to the student. I'm concerend that the relationship may now not be salvagable and I will be on tenterhooks every time I teach that class - should I move her to another class? ( I have taken on students who didn't get on with other teachers). I'm also an NQT - should I speak to my co-ordinator (the VP) about this?
    Sorry for the ramble but this is my first horrible experience ( and it the exact opposite of all other parent experiences I have ever had) and it's left me a bit shaken. Any advice appreciated
    Thanks
     
  3. Msz

    Msz Established commenter

    I think you have posted this on the wrong forum this is primary
    but speak to your mentor or subject coordinator
     
  4. clear_air

    clear_air New commenter

    Definately speak to your colleagues and/or mentor. Sounds like a hideous experience!
     

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