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After another couple of weeks of pabulum...

Discussion in 'Personal' started by racroesus, Sep 29, 2020.

  1. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    ... something to get your teeth into.

    I have come to the conclusion that bananas are becoming more recalcitrant when required to adorn slices of toast. I appreciate that there are various problems with using them when too young or too old but even bananas of three days of age from purchase when green now cause problems.
    My sainted Mother never complained about bananas when overlaying them on my toast and when I eventually took over bananaing operations from Mother (Maleficent refused) I experienced no problems.
    Now, however, I am finding the bananaing of breakfast toast to be an anxiety inducing operation. To get full coverage of the toasted bread requires judgement of the bananas available, the bread slices available and a fine calculation of the number of slices that can be produced with full coverage whereby there are no gaps as would appear when slices of banana are laid edge to edge. A small piece of banana left over is a rewarding tidbit but any bare buttered toast would be anathema and put me in a severe depression for the rest of the day.
    Quite recently I have begun to have problems; if I use a table knife for slicing the banana I find it cuts badly when I need to exercise very fine control of slice thickness which puts me in danger of not having sufficient banana to completely banana all the toast. I have used a sharper knife but I find that my control of delivering the banana slice to the toast is compromised. I think I need a sharp knife with a broad, shortish blade. I was wondering if any of out culinary experts could recommend a suitable implement.
  2. monicabilongame

    monicabilongame Star commenter

    Push the banana through the wires


    Slice it up longways with a cheese slice

    For the really skinny green banana
  3. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    The slices would be much too thick. Thank you for your suggestion.
    Dunteachin likes this.
  4. blazer

    blazer Star commenter

    mash the banana and spread it on?
  5. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    Go and sanitize your finger tips.
  6. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    Aesthetically poor.
    Dunteachin likes this.
  7. Dunteachin

    Dunteachin Star commenter

    This is what comes of being a scientist.
    We creatives slice it roughly onto the bread or toast, then mash vigorously with the back of a fork.

    Note the adverbs.
    jellycowfish likes this.
  8. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    You think I don't know what adverbs are? I see creatives, bread, toast, back and fork.
  9. Dunteachin

    Dunteachin Star commenter

  10. Incommunicado

    Incommunicado Established commenter

    These problems would never have arisen had we voted to remain in the EU.
    mothorchid and lanokia like this.
  11. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    The time frame is right.
  12. lanokia

    lanokia Star commenter

    Don't eat bananas and toast.
  13. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    Why live?
  14. Ivartheboneless

    Ivartheboneless Star commenter

    Just have marmalade like NORMAL people.
    blazer and Bungie like this.
  15. modelmaker

    modelmaker Star commenter

    Have you not got one of these machines in your kitchen? It's what professional banana slicists use.

  16. monicabilongame

    monicabilongame Star commenter

    Just slice them thick and use more bananas. Simples
  17. Stiltskin

    Stiltskin Star commenter

    Use a mandolin but watch your fingers
  18. Mangleworzle

    Mangleworzle Star commenter

    Are woodwind instruments acceptable too?
  19. mothorchid

    mothorchid Star commenter

    Mr Mothorchid says bananas taste of bird vomit. I am not sure how he knows this.
    I like bananas,but not sliced on toast. A waste of toast, which could have marmite, marmalade or crunchy peanut butter spread over it instead.
    Sliced, ripe bananas, with a sprinkling of dark brown sugar and evaporated milk was a regular pudding when I was little. That's yummy.
    My grandpa used to have slices of banana over his all bran in the mornings. I have all bran or granola with natural yoghurt rather than milk and sliced banana is good in that.
    But on toast? No way.
    gainly likes this.
  20. Aquamarina1234

    Aquamarina1234 Star commenter

    The firstest first-world problem I have ever read!
    monicabilongame and mothorchid like this.

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