1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest, welcome to the TES Community!

    Connect with like-minded professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.

    Don't forget to look at the how to guide.

    Dismiss Notice

Advice on Baby Born just under 35 weeks

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by lilypot, Jan 20, 2011.

  1. Hi

    I'm just looking for advice from mothers who have had babies born between 34 -35 weeks in regards to how long it took their LO to do certain things. The advice from the HV is all very vague as no one can tell how long it will take my LO because she was so early. I know that it does vary but to hear of other people's experiences would be really helpful.
    The things I would like to know are:
    1) How long before your LO slept longer through the night (i.e. 4 hours and longer)
    2) Did / Do you find that your LO finds it hard to sleep at night unless he/she is on you or OH?
    3) Did you / do you dream feed and if so, when did you start to implement it?
    4) When did your LO start to focus?
    My LO is now 4 weeks and a week away from when she was meant to be born but still wondering when to expect these milestones - particularly the night ones.
    Thanks
    Lily
     
  2. Hi

    I'm just looking for advice from mothers who have had babies born between 34 -35 weeks in regards to how long it took their LO to do certain things. The advice from the HV is all very vague as no one can tell how long it will take my LO because she was so early. I know that it does vary but to hear of other people's experiences would be really helpful.
    The things I would like to know are:
    1) How long before your LO slept longer through the night (i.e. 4 hours and longer)
    2) Did / Do you find that your LO finds it hard to sleep at night unless he/she is on you or OH?
    3) Did you / do you dream feed and if so, when did you start to implement it?
    4) When did your LO start to focus?
    My LO is now 4 weeks and a week away from when she was meant to be born but still wondering when to expect these milestones - particularly the night ones.
    Thanks
    Lily
     
  3. Hey, I am not 100% helpful as my little one was born full term at 38 weeks but nothing you have mentioned seems to far from general exprience
    Quite a long time- 6 weeks I think we were having two wake ups, which we are getting again now (5 months). It was exhausting, every hour in the first weeks.... but gradually those windows of sleep extended

    Dreamfeeding- we found she woke up at the same time anyway so stopped- we feed as she wants me to! You could try at any time- see what works.

    Yes - this is totally normal, I think a heartbeat sounding thing in the matress helped, it sounded like a heartbeat everytime she squeaked and soothed her no end....
    She slept on my stomach/OH stomach for a couple of weeks - exhausting! YOU can try heating matress up with a hot water bottle, swaddling, putting your t-shirt in so baby can smell you, white noise can help, some people swear by slumber bears- google amazon. We wrapped a towel in a sausage shape around her to make her feel more secure.

    It may take a little longer to get her/him sleeping longer- how big was the birthweight? You will get there- it may seem like you will never sleep again but it won;t feel long and life will be much easier
     
  4. Hi
    My twins were born at 33 weeks and spent over a month in SCBU with oxygen, feeding tubes etc. They were also only 3lbs each, and being twins probably at a bit of a disadvantage to being a single baby. So the comparison with your baby may not be accurate and I do not at all want to scare you. Also, my twins are boys and it takes boys longer at some things than girls. The boys were sleeping through the night by about 5 months but mostly I think because we had a very Gina Ford-like routine mainly to keep my sanity! I used to swaddle the boys tightly when they were your baby's age in either a sheet or blanket and this seemed to help. Also I rolled up towels into long sausage shapes and put them either side of the baby to give them the feeling of being against something. This was a trick from the SCBU. I did dream feed both of them about 10pm probably about 10 weeks but I cant be sure of that. Not too sure about focussing but I do know at the 6 week check-up when they are suppossed to smile etc the boys were no-where near that. They have been delayed in every aspect, language aquisition, speech, walking, social cues etc and have had an extra year in nursery. Now they are 5 and although still immature are catching up with their peer group. Its very hard not to worry about milestones and my husband and I have worked hard to try to bring the boys on but at the end of the day children do things when they are ready. I hope this helps you and the best of luck with your baby.
     
  5. as you know I was not as early as this but still early 36 weeks
    She will get there Lily - just in her own time - example been to 12 week check today - LO isn't holding his hands together and staring at them (no where near) she said don't worry as he should only be 8 weeks old and so not to be worried until he gets to the point where he would be 12 weeks if he had gone to term
    x
     
  6. landaise

    landaise Occasional commenter

    My first was born at 36 weeks ( after I'd spent 1 month in hospital on a drip to stop contractions that had started at 32 weeks )
    Went through the night 11pm-6am at six weeks. Never woke up for feeds after that and didn't have bad nights even when teething.
    Liked to sleep on us during the day, but no big problems going off to sleep in moses basket during the night.
    Don't know what you mean by dreamfeed !
    Not behind in holding up head, picking things up etc. Walked at 11 months, talked in full sentences from the first real words, took to solids with no problems! Was, however late getting first tooth ( 12 months old, was walking competently before ! ) but toilet trained at 2years 3 months ( took three days to do it !)
    She's now in her first year at university and was always near the top of the class in school.
    Every child is different and it's not necessarily a good thing to compare but we all do it. My doctor said little babies are often real fighters as they seem to know that they have to grow faster. Your little one will take her time but she'll get there, they always do. Good luck!
     
  7. Thanks everyone. Your experiences have been really helpful.
    We had a bit of a bad night last night, but she's just doing things in her own time. I know that when I look at her big eyes, she's just doing what she knows best (feeding and pooing!) and I love her totally for it (even with the sleepless nights).
    Babies are a funny thing - so small yet totally amazing. Although as my sister said to me when I was changing her the other day, how can something so beautiful at the top end produce something something so revolting at the bottom end!
    You have to laugh at them ....!
    Thanks once again everyone!
    x
     
  8. Hi Lilypot - congratulations and well done on your LO!
    If it makes you feel any better my LO was born at 42 + 2 weeks and spent the first 8 weeks going to sleep like this!
     
  9. Hi lilypot,
    I spent ages typing a reply to you yesterday but it's not on the thread so obviously TES was playing up (or I've accidentally posted it elsewhere!).
    My little man was born at 34+4, he's now nearly 24 weeks old.
    I can't remember when I realised he could focus but I know that it all seemed normal and his sight has always seemed good. His eyes were all over the palce for the first couple of weeks but this is true of any baby.
    We've never given dream feeds because I don't really agree with it, he sleeps for ten hours so he obviously doesn't need one.
    We were together in hospital for the first nine days of his life and I was 'trained' (sad though it may be) to feed him and put him straight back down so he has always been used to being put down to sleep. Having said that, we have always been able to get him to sleep on us easier than in his bed. But again, I think this is normal.
    As for sleeping, he went nine hours the night after his first jabs and that became the norm within a few weeks. By 12 weeks he was sleeping through for ten hours every night. We've had hiccups when he's had growth spurts and teething problems but he always returns to his ten or eleven hours.
    I can't remember what your other Qs were!
    One thing I do remember- he first smiled in response to me at exactly nine weeks old. I know that because I happened to be taking a photograph of him with bricks spelling out 'nine weeks' in the picture and I captured his first real smile- magic.
    MrsD
    xxx
     
  10. That's beautiful. My LO smiles now (but most likely due to wind) but I can't wait until she means to do it.
    Thanks for sharing your experiences, Mrs D. It's always interesting to read how other people's premature LOs get on with the milestones.
    Lily
     
  11. madenglishgirl

    madenglishgirl New commenter

    My LO was born slightly later at 36 weeks - we were doing 4 hour stretches at night at a month old, smiled relatively late at 8 weeks (though that may have had something to do with me), She was sitting up confidentally at 8 months and was walking at 21 months. We have had no problems whatsoever with her speech (in fact she has always been way beyond her peers) and her physical delay has been put down to severe hypermobility.
     
  12. Chica77

    Chica77 New commenter

    I was born at 36 weeks (in 1977!!) and my mum says that i crawled/walked/spoke earlier than average. I don't suppose she remembers the other things, but i know we were in the hospital for 2 weeks after, and back then babies went into a nursery at night, so i would've slept away from my mum and not on her. I slept in a crib (which my son also slept in as a newborn, and my baby due at the end of April will do too!).
    My son was 10 days late, so can't help from personal experience. He slept for longer stretches at about 6 weeks, but has never been that good a sleeper and only now at 19 months he has started going through the night for a good 10 hours, but not every night!
     
  13. Hi
    My adopted daughter was born at 29 weeks.
    She's 2 years and 8 months old now and her neonatal consultant is amazed that she is all caught up and perfectly normal.

     
  14. So there is hope for us yet! I can't remember who asked, but my LO's birth weight was 5lb 1oz (which is quite a good weight for such a prem baby). A month on and she's now 6lb 4oz so we're clearly doing something right.
    I must say I've now virtually given up putting her back in her moses basket for the time being and going to be more strict when she's supposed to have been born. My mum had a nice way of looking at things from my LO's perspective - that during the day when there is noise and light she is fine because she can subconsciously hear us, but at night, when it's dark and silent, being in a lonely moses basket is a scary place. So, she is with us until she's her full term and then I'll be more strict ......honest! (well that's what I keep telling myself!).
    HWL - it's very reassuring to hear of such positive experiences of prem babies being no different to their full term peers.
    Many thanks everyone!
    Lily
     
  15. Thanks for bringing this back up - sounds like your LO is doing well.
    My LO has come on leaps and bounds. She's now 19 and a half weeks, weighing in at just over 14lb in her last weigh-in (week or so ago) - so she's really piled the weight on and now on the 50th percentile for a 19 week old as opposed to a 14 week old.
    She's just started on solids and taking to it fine. She's not bad on her tummy at all and can hold her head up well. She likes to kick her legs like this so I think she's got a bit of motivation to crawl but doesn't have the strength or understanding as to how to do it yet.
    She's only recently really started to reach out and grab for things accurately so making good progress really!
    It seems that being early hasn't stopped her at all which is a huge relief!
    Thank you for asking! [​IMG]
     
  16. Brilliant to read of your Lo's great progress lilypot and so encouraging from a personal perspective as i worry about my baby's development if she is born very soon. very pleased to hear things are going well for you all!
    Thanks for upping it too mrsd. i haven't read this thread before and it's very useful.
     
  17. My LO was born without sucking reflex too - was fed by cup for 3 days. He was born at 36 weeks 5lb 15oz. Midwives were great too at letting me try and feed him first and then giving him formula from a cup. Also in encouraging me to express, encouraging my milk to come. I am still breast feeding now. LO 27 weeks - Another example - it can be done - I just think you have to be determined that its what you want to do. (Not that there is anything wrong with formula feeding)
     
  18. Thanks Ladies. that's great to read. NCT workshop was ok last night. She did touch on prem babies at my request which was helpful as I hope so much I will BF in time. i knew it would be a bit militant about BF but it was 'worse' than i imagined. A friend recently had PND partly because BF didn't work out for her and she was so disappointed and guilty. I know she attended the same workshop back in February and i can see why she felt so bad now. I do think they should be more balanced and not put such pressure on new mums. Rant over!!
     
  19. landaise

    landaise Occasional commenter

    I tried breast feeding my second, but it didn't work out: I didn't produce enough milk and he started losing weight. My GP was wonderful, just said " scrap it and give him the bottle ", never made me feel guilty (although I still now wish I hadnt tried as you can't help feeling you're incapable of doing something 'natural')
    The way you feed is personal choice, no one should be made to feel superior or inferior because they choose breast or bottle. As if being a new parent isn't hard enough !
     
  20. Our NCT group wasn't too militant on BF..but the teacher was pretty useless. I guess it depends on the person running it but it must be horrible if you are struggling and not getting the support you need if you are switching to FF.
    Some people do feel they have the right to make you feel inferior- but usually they are insecure themselves and need to get a life.

    Bfing is hard work, and I hope it does work for you Ladymarm. But, if it doesn't- it doesn't mean you are any less of a parent.

     

Share This Page