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A positive story? You decide

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by princesslegend, Feb 21, 2019.

  1. princesslegend

    princesslegend Occasional commenter

    So... i left God afwul school nearly 2 years ago and moved to Lovely school where I am still and very happy. SLT at awful school have been losing staff left, right and centre. Oh dear. BUT... Not my business.

    I bumped into the DH of awful school in a coffee shop on Monday and he started talking AT me, becoming very aggressive - nothing new for him. Apparently, i've been shooting my mouth off about his management style and now he can't get a job. I asked him what he meant and apparently he's been told at two interviews that "former staff members have made their feelings known" and has been "rejected for no good reason" at 3 more. I have not done anything of the sort. What's the point? It makes me look petty. And i'm not (that) petty.

    I'm not ashamed to say I laughed in his face and told him if he thinks that even for a minute he's still on my radar then he has issues. And then I wished him all the best in fiding a job. And then I left.

    I also left my muffin at the till but I wanted to save face and so it became a casualty of the situation.

    So, while this isn't a dilemma, I thought you, my fellow TESsers would want to know. Is this a good thing? I feel bad that he can't get a job but also... don't treat people badly and they won't b**ch about you.

  2. hisir

    hisir New commenter

    God I love karma. He can't get a job so blames everyone else. I bet he's the kind of person who rocks up to an interview and assumes he's a shoe-in for the job. I love it when people get their comeuppance. Gutted about the muffin though.
  3. princesslegend

    princesslegend Occasional commenter

    I bet he's the kind of person who rocks up to an interview and assumes he's a shoe-in for the job.

    OMG you've met him, then?!
    Cooperuk, Mrsmumbles, ATfan and 6 others like this.
  4. foxtail3

    foxtail3 Star commenter

    Chickens/ roost?

    There’ll be another muffin!
  5. Piscean1

    Piscean1 Occasional commenter

    I am also devastated about the muffin.

    However, karma is brilliant! He's dramatically suspecting all and sundry, I assume but they will likely have heard it from either the Head themselves or from somebody they have employed. Glad they don't want to touch him with a barge pole. He can stop ruining people's lives now.

    He's also rather short-sighted. If you were the talker, what he's given you is gold! Poor muffin. How many times have his sort used the "education is a small world and people talk" threat and now he's the deserving victim of it?
    Cooperuk, Mrsmumbles, ATfan and 7 others like this.
  6. sbkrobson

    sbkrobson Star commenter

    I'm struggling to get why somebody else not being able to get a job and myself potentially being a reason for this could be a good thing on any level at all.
    If the person was vile enough, a parking space? Yeah.maybe.
    But a livelihood?
    People post on this forum about difficulties in continuing their career, and speculate that it may be because of poor reference or spoilt working relationships. Sometimes it may be because their track record at work is poor. And the response is overwhelmingly suggestions how to work around this, how to get through it.
    How to continue in your career.
    I am often one of such respondees, and find it hard to celebrate somebody being royally stuffed in finding a job in a school, so-no. It is not a positive story.
    It is vengeful rather than constructive.
    Last edited: Feb 21, 2019
    starlightexpress and tonymars like this.
  7. princesslegend

    princesslegend Occasional commenter

    Might be worth telling you all that when a friend of mine tried to leave and was successfully offered a job, he called her new school and informed them of stuff she'd done before she was even a teacher (i.e. cage fighting) and told them she was was violent.

    Sorry, but yes. He deserves it.
  8. meggyd

    meggyd Senior commenter

    Treat yourself to a whole plate of muffins. Who launches into a verbal attack in a coffee shop in front of strangers at half term?
  9. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    Wouldn't worry about it if I were you.

    You don't have to deal with him on a day-to-day basis any more.

    So forget him.
    thekillers1, strawbs, nomad and 2 others like this.
  10. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    However - if it ever happens again - threaten him with legal action.
  11. sbkrobson

    sbkrobson Star commenter

    It would be worth more to me if that friend of yours posted that dilemma here, and we could come up with ninety nine different suggestions how they may improve their situation.
    Making sure their managers could not find a job themselves ain't one of them.
    jlishman2158 likes this.
  12. princesslegend

    princesslegend Occasional commenter

    I don't think it was her. She was far too broken after that place.
    I don't actually believe it was anyone who's left. I honestly believe it's someone who's still there. It just doesn't make sense.
    I do however think that if you go out of your way to try and desroy a person on a personal and professional level, then it's only right that it happens to you.
  13. SundaeTrifle

    SundaeTrifle Occasional commenter

    Ugh, sounds like he’s not fit to be anywhere near the education of children.

    Well done you for moving on and not being fazed by him. Good response.

    Glad you are in a better place. You can smile at life.
    Jazztess79, Mrsmumbles, ATfan and 4 others like this.
  14. hisir

    hisir New commenter

    If only. I'd like to have done so, just so I could compare him to every other arrogant tw*t I've met!!
  15. princesslegend

    princesslegend Occasional commenter

    Exactly! I was so confused by the whole thing. But it made me realise how far i've come. 2 years ago, i'd have cried and vomitted everywhere. He was the biggest bully i've ever met.
    Jazztess79, Mrsmumbles, Curae and 6 others like this.
  16. Piscean1

    Piscean1 Occasional commenter

    Perhaps he should try changing his management style where he is? If he made efforts to adjust his behaviour, that might stand him in better stead.

    I don't think it's vengeful to feel relief that somebody obviously so damaging and unsuited to leadership is being prevented from affecting more staff negatively. Management like him make people ill.

    Most people, as you say, would seek advice and be supported. He has verbally attacked someone in a coffee shop.

    OP - does he still work at the old place? If so, it's not really about his livelihood. He's still drawing a wage. He's just not where he wants to be, and given that's he has obviously made others feel that way, perhaps that's no bad thing.
  17. meggyd

    meggyd Senior commenter

    I assume he still is in a job and has not lost the job at awful school. So no one has lost their livelihood. ...unlike many who post on these boards and are utterly broken mentally and financially. Just a spoilt baby who can not get what he wants ...ie promotion.
  18. princesslegend

    princesslegend Occasional commenter

    Last i heard, he was still there. I don't intend on contacting the school or governors to say anything - that would ake him really believe it was me who mouthed off. But you're right - it isn't about his livelihood. It's about his pride and his belief that he is untouchable. I've no doubt he'll find a school soon.
    jlishman2158 and agathamorse like this.
  19. Stiltskin

    Stiltskin Lead commenter

    If you go back to the shop and say you managed to leave your muffin at the till they may replace it for you.
  20. peakster

    peakster Star commenter

    I heard recently that the worst bully I ever came across has recently got a headship.

    But not in the school I work in.

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