1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest, welcome to the TES Community!

    Connect with like-minded professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.

    Don't forget to look at the how to guide.

    Dismiss Notice

6 year old girl who consistently refuses to follow instructions! Advice appreciated!

Discussion in 'Behaviour' started by LongBlonde, Mar 8, 2011.

  1. I teach a Year 2 class of 21 children who are all reasonably well behaved. However, I am struggling with one girl who refuses to follow instructions and will only choose to take part in certain activities.
    At the beginning of the year she refused to even move off the carpet and walk to her table to complete a piece of work set for her. She could/would only write her name however now she does write simple sentences and with a lot of input she is getting better at applying her phonic knowledge. She will, now, follow most instructions and with constant support will engage in her work. This has taken a lot of effort by myself and my TA. Where at the beginning of the school year she wouldn't answer her name in the register she now does... with constant encouragement and it is begrudgingly!!
    I'll get to my problem... she constantly refuses to take part in the exercises we do each morning and afternoon before register. She stands routed to the spot. I've talked to her and asked her why and she tells me it's because she doesn't like everyone watching her, so I moved her to the back so the children aren't facing her. I have pointed out that she doesn't mind doing PE with everyone watching her to which she replied 'yeah but I like PE!'
    We've tried follwing our whole school behaviour plan which after plenty of warnings she has been staying in a playtimes outside the head's office - this doesn't seem to bother her. We've tried rewards and positive encouragement but to no avail. This isn't the only thing she refuses to do, she picks and chooses what she prefers to do. Today she wailed (no tears - this is how she gets her way at home) when having her photo taken by the photographer because she "didn't want to do it today!"
    She has made such good progress in other areas that I just don't want these things to spoil all the good progress she has made.
    Any advice would be greatly appreciated :)
     
  2. I teach a Year 2 class of 21 children who are all reasonably well behaved. However, I am struggling with one girl who refuses to follow instructions and will only choose to take part in certain activities.
    At the beginning of the year she refused to even move off the carpet and walk to her table to complete a piece of work set for her. She could/would only write her name however now she does write simple sentences and with a lot of input she is getting better at applying her phonic knowledge. She will, now, follow most instructions and with constant support will engage in her work. This has taken a lot of effort by myself and my TA. Where at the beginning of the school year she wouldn't answer her name in the register she now does... with constant encouragement and it is begrudgingly!!
    I'll get to my problem... she constantly refuses to take part in the exercises we do each morning and afternoon before register. She stands routed to the spot. I've talked to her and asked her why and she tells me it's because she doesn't like everyone watching her, so I moved her to the back so the children aren't facing her. I have pointed out that she doesn't mind doing PE with everyone watching her to which she replied 'yeah but I like PE!'
    We've tried follwing our whole school behaviour plan which after plenty of warnings she has been staying in a playtimes outside the head's office - this doesn't seem to bother her. We've tried rewards and positive encouragement but to no avail. This isn't the only thing she refuses to do, she picks and chooses what she prefers to do. Today she wailed (no tears - this is how she gets her way at home) when having her photo taken by the photographer because she "didn't want to do it today!"
    She has made such good progress in other areas that I just don't want these things to spoil all the good progress she has made.
    Any advice would be greatly appreciated :)
     
  3. Welllll. I don't claim to be any sort of expert. But this behaviour seems to be bringing her a lot of attention. If it was me, I would just ignore her. Seriously. I would stop the coaxing. If she did anything as soon as I asked, I would praise her (but not too effusively). Provided she is not in any danger, I would just leave her to her own little strop. She will get bored. I would try to lavish my praise on the rest of the class.
    Her strategy of being a little madam, obviously works at home! You don't need to reinforce it by making her a special case at school. Give attention to reinforce the good stuff. Like when she just gets on when asked without a fuss.
    The rest of the class might wonder what is going on and question why you are doing nothing about it her being on strike. But try to turn into a positive "Well done X, I can see you are getting on. Mrs Z will be really impressed with you.etc etc..".
    It takes a bit of nerve though... Like ignoring walking away (but not too far) from your puce 2 year old having a screaming tantrum in the middle of the supermarket aisle. Which I did. And it worked.
    Also someone else posted this elsewhere and it is good advice. Never say please. Say "right, time to go back to your seats, thankyou". It is a subtle distinction that implies you are expecting compliance. It is still polite, but has more authority.
    As I say, I am by no means an expert, but have lots of parenting experience.
    Good luck.
     
  4. RaymondSoltysek

    RaymondSoltysek New commenter

    Very sensible post, sunpainter - sounds about right to me!
     
  5. Thank you so much for that. Lots to consider. I'm not a parent so your advice is invaluable!
     
  6. minnieminx

    minnieminx New commenter

    I would give her a choice: Comply or sit on the floor by herself at the side. Quick and clear choice and she can sulk all day if she so chooses. No attention while she is there, as the first poster said, totally ignoring her will be the best way, but you do need her out of the way for her sulk. Praise when she does the right thing.

    You have more willpower than her, she is only 6! It might not feel that way, but you do and you can win this one. Just keep going calmly and consistently (Join in properly or don't no fuss) and she will respond eventually. Remember it has taken 6 years to get to this point, it won't be fully sorted in a few weeks.
     

Share This Page